I woke up this morning with a bad hangover,
and my penis was missing again
This happens all the time
It's detachable
This comes in handy a lot of the time
I can leave it home when I think it's going to get me in trouble,
or I can rent it out when I don't need it
But now and then I go to a party,
get drunk,
and the next morning I can't for the life of me
rememberwhat I did with it
First I looked around my apartment
and I couldn't find it,
so I called up the place where the party was,
they hadn't seen it either
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
coz for some reason,
I leave it there sometimes,
but not this time
So I told them if it pops up
to let me know
I called a few people who were at the party,
but they were no help either
I was starting to get desperate
I really don't like being without my penis for too long
It makes me feel like less of a man
and I really hate to have to sit down every time I take a leak
After a few hours of searching the house
and calling everyone I could think of,
I was starting to get very depressed,
so I went to the Kiev and ate breakfast
Then as I walked down Second Avenue toward St Mark's Place,
where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street,
I saw my penis lying on a blanket next to a broken toaster oven
Some guy was selling it
I had to buy it off him
He wanted 22 bucks,
but I talked him down to 17
I took it home,
washed it off,
and put it back on
I was happy again
Complete
People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached,
but I don't know Even though sometimes it's a pain in the ass,
I like having a detachable penis