Mrs Lovett:
There was a barber and his wife,
And he was beautiful,
A proper artist with a knife,
But they transported him for life
And he was beautiful

[Spoken]

Barker his name was-- Benjamin Barker

Todd: [Spoken]
Transported? What was his crime?

Mrs Lovett: [Spoken]
Foolishness

He had this wife, you see,
Pretty little thing
Silly little nit
Had her chance for the moon on a string--
Poor thing, poor thing

There were these two, you see,
Wanted her like mad,
One of 'em a judge,
T'other one his beadle
Every day they'd nudge
And they'd wheedle
Still she wouldn't budge
From her needle
Too bad Pure thing

So they merely shipped the poor blighter off south, they did,
Leaving her with nothing but grief and a year-old kid
Did she use her head even then? Oh no, God forbid!
Poor fool
Ah, but there was worse yet to come--
Poor thing

[Spoken]

Johanna, that was the baby's name
Pretty little Johanna

Todd: [Spoke]
Go on

Mrs Lovett: [Spoken]
My, but you do like a good story, don't you?

Well, Beadle calls on her, all polite,
Poor thing, poor thing
The judge, he tells her, is all contrite,
He blames himself for her dreadful plight,
She must come straight to his house tonight!
Poor thing, poor thing

Of course, when she goes there,
Poor thing, poor thing,
They're havin' this ball all in masks
There's no one she knows there,
Poor dear, poor thing,
She wanders tormented, and drinks,
Poor thing
The judge has repented, she thinks,
Poor thing
"Oh, where is Judge Turpin?" she asks

He was there, all right--
Only not so contrite!
She wasn't no match for such craft, you see,
And everone thought it so droll
They figured she had to be daft, you see,
So all of 'em stood there and laughed, you see
Poor soul!
Poor thing!

Todd: [Spoken]
Would no one have mercy on her!

Mrs Lovett: [Spoken]
So it is you-- Benjamin Barker

Todd: [Spoken]
Not Barker! Not Barker! Todd now! Sweeney Todd!

Mrs Lovett: [Spoken]
Oh, you poor thing You poor thing Wait!
See! When they come for the little girl, I hid 'em I thought,
Who knows? Maybe the poor silly blighter'll be back again
Someday and need 'em Cracked in the head, wasn't I?
Times as bad as they are, I could have got five, maybe ten
Quid for 'em, any day See? You can be a barber again