I've lost a truly special friend
I swear I'll never drink again
I'd like to talk to you alone
If I could walk, I'd walk you home
I'd like to kiss you in the street
But that's so cheesy and so cheap
And so they banned me from the bar
I've got no family for my family car
That I've been using a s a bed
And when the battery is dead
I could cry myself to sleep
But that's so cheesy and so cheap
Am I a man? Am I a mouse?
Who wears the trousers in this house?
I am the rat that killed your cat
Who painted then destroyed your flat
You slapped me and I slapped you black and blue
And that's so cheesy and so cheap