I call you from the car to say I'll be there in a while A short plane ride and I will get to see your pretty smile There's nothing on the radio- I fiddle with t...

I lie next her in the bed, She's the kind of girl I'd like to wed, Never mind the fact that she's dead, It turns me on It turns me on Sure, She's a little cold...

Albino - Stephen Lynch (intro)-I wanted to write a song about the three loves of my life that have slipped away some howbut, i could only come up with two I wa...

Alright Hey, hey what do you say? I come from a place called the US of A Ho, ho what do you know? Hop in my car and let's go Well this is a song for America, H...

Baby - Stephen Lynch This is for my little girl My lady gives birth today I run to her room right away She smiles with glee, and hands her to me I look at my ne...

Do you know Tony Montana? Rode a boat here from Havana, Scar from eating pussy lines his face Finds a day job washing dishes, Hates his life, he only wishes Som...

Beelz - Stephen Lynch (Intro) I figured since I wrote a song about you know God and Jesus and all that I would have to give the opposition equal time (Song) E...

Mark: I like my toast buttered Stephen: and i'll take mine dry Mark: I dig the beatles Stephen: i'm a stones kinda guy Mark: I have fine taste Stephen: and i ...

had to see you one last time theres something on my mind how do i say what needs to be said? the words are hard to find how about bitch give me my money i want...

You watch me on your TV Say that my job is easy Say I am not athletic You think my sport's pathetic But you can't judge me 'till you walked a mile in my bowlin...

I get home late from work tonight Baby, my body's achin' Can't stop thinkin' 'bout you and me And the love that we'll be makin' So I chill the champagne Light a...

I made love to ya all night long then i got up to write you a song i watched ya sleep and i fell in love ya must've been sent from heaven above don't think you ...

Craig - Stephen Lynch [00:14]Everyone knows Jesus, [00:17]The guy who healed the lame [00:21]Well, I am Jesus' brother, [00:24]Craig is my name [00:31]Jesus is...

Charlie Brown had a big block head wore a stripy sweater everyday Tried to kick that football but Lucy always pulled the mother fucker away Flew a kite just to ...

I got my twelve sided die and im ready to roll with a wizard and my goblin crew, My friends are comin over to my moms basement bringin funyuns and the mountain ...

i got my twelve sided die and im ready to roll with a wizard and my goblin crew, my friends are comin over to my moms basement bringin funyuns and the mountain ...

[00:04]Harmonica [00:10]More harmonica [00:16]I got my twelve sided die and I'm ready to roll with a wizard and my goblin crew [00:22]My friends are coming ove...

Dear diary, today was a good day Papa and I picked wild flowers Mama joined and we lay in the sunshine Then we sang and danced for hours I know tomorrow will b...

Dear diary, today was a great day Bought myself a brand new horse She's strong and fast and so very beautiful And just a little wild of course I know tomorrow I...

Dear Diary Today was a fine day I got the music in my soul I'm writing songs and making records I feel my life is finally whole I can't wait to tell my father T...

Dear Diary Today was a grand day Took a bath, had a spot of tea Did the New York Times crossword puzzle Listened to a symphony I think I'll go for a leisurely d...

Lad, it's your duty to find ye a lass With child-bearing hips and a pink, supple ass And make her your wife and love her with love so true Now some rivers run h...

I'm a rich and famous doctor I always thought I'd be An expert in the field of Gynecology Next on my agenda: Checking your pudenda Let me see what I can find I...

Wanna have some quality time with my son So I brought him down to the fishin' hole Didn't like the feelin' of that worm in his hand Got mad, threw down his fish...

here we are dear old friend you and i drunk again laughs have been and and tears have been shed maybe the whiskey's gone to my head but if i were gay i would g...

I bought a gerbil at the petting zoo If richard grear can do it I can too I get undress I start to lube I stick the gerbil at the end of the tube Wondering just...

When Grandfather dies Life will be strange When Grandfather dies My whole world will change When Grandfather dies I'll scream and I'll yell 'Cause I'll be fucki...

All my days I live with my disgrace I'm afraid to show my face Or at least take off my underwear See I was born Like a half way neutered pet I don't have a mat...

I want to write you a poem That stands the test of all time A couplet, a quatrain, a ballad, a note With meter and rythym and rhyme I want it to speak of your ...

Thinking of all the cool creatures that I will meet on this night Ghosts and goblins and witches roaming the streets in moonlight Bowls of candy and goodies, de...

She's part girl, she's part boy She's got parts everyone can enjoy She's got more, she's got less She's got her manhood tucked in her dress Is she a mister, o...

Stephen: I have to redo the vocals for Medieval Bush Friends: Why? Stephen: Cause I said 1570's muff instead of 1470's muff and the medieval period ended at the...

I gotta tune that im gonna sing with my buddy mark here (ok) I wrote this cuz me and mark have been friends for a really really long time and uh I think what ma...

Here we are Dear old friends You and i drunk again laughs have been had tears have been shed maybe the whisky has gone to my head but if i were gay i would give...

Here we are Dear old friends You and i drunk again Laughs have been had Tears have been shed Maybe the whisky has gone to my head But if i were gay I would give...

I see you there Behind the glass I drop a quarter in the slot and then I watch as you Shake that ass I watch you grind I watch you dance I show you mine, you sh...

Seven, eight, nine, ten Olie, olie oxenfree! Ed come on Kids No, it's hide and seek You're supposed to hide when you're Find a tree or something, hide Come on E...

Pokemon's a silly faze Barney's now just purple haze The Power Rangers lost their will to fight Yeah the pigs in space, they rule the sky And Oscar's still a g...

when the game of life makes you feel like quiting it helps a lot if you, kill a kitten mark my words cause from were im sitting you cant go wrong if you, kill a...

There's a man who pedals into danger If you eat chinese food, this guys no stranger He's weaving down the block The man will risk his life to bring you egg roll...

You're the love of my life But it cuts like my wife and I feel that I'm being misled See I'm a little concerned for I've recently learned of the swastika tattoo...

Little Tiny Moustache - Stephen Lynch You're the love of my life But it cuts like a knife and I feel that I'm being misled See I'm a little concerned for I've r...

If I had a hammer, I'd build a house for two And if I had a sailing ship, I'd take a trip with you And if I had a poets hand, I'd write a verse for thee And if ...

STEPHEN LYNCH DON'T WANT THAN HIS LYRICS WILL BE PUBBLICATED ON MY WEBSITE, YOU CAN FIND HIS LYRICS ON HIS HOMEPAGE: http://wwwstephenlynchcom/ Webmaster

hush little girl sweet baby dont cry, tonight daddy is here and he'll sing you a soft lullaby, tonight why cant it all be like it was before how can i explain w...

Hush little girl Sweet baby don't cry Tonight Daddy is here and he'll sing you a soft lullaby Tonight Why can't it all be like it was before? How can I explain ...

Hush little girl sweet baby don't cry, tonight Daddy is here and he'll sing you a soft lullabye, tonight Why can't it all be like it was before How can I explai...

Come, fair lady to my bed, we go, And verily sweet pleasure's we shall know, Yet, where thy belly meets thy limb, I beseech thee give a trim, For thy bush doth ...

It's College time again September's almost here Hanging with freshmen girls Frat party kegs of beer I see a girl I'm wanting Mixer at delta chi We take some oxy...

You say that's you're leaving but just for a day The company wants you to fly to LA So you leave me alone and I sit and I say What will I do today Today while y...

Hey, Well we come from Alabama, but were in Afghanistan Were navy seals and green marines, hunting for a man They say he has a beard, a face, a dipper on his he...

My story is so tiresome (tiresome!) Back in France, I was rich as they come (as they come!) But I lost all my wealth And my good mental health Now I live with z...

deep in prayer my cross to wear i kneel upon the floor temptations of a catholic priest aren't easy to ignore but i can not control myself he rips my soul apart...

I used to think the perfect girl was only in my dreams Until I saw your perfect face upon the movie screen You seemed to know that I was there As though from Go...

She gotta smile, Yeah, She gotta smile and she's flashin' it right at me She gotta wink, a wink across the bar and I know that it's meant to be She gotta walk...

When I was a boy of 10, I had a very best friend Fred was kind, with good intent But just a little different Oh, special Fred Mama dropped him on his head Now ...

When I was A boy of ten I had a very best friend Ed was kind WIth good intent but just a little different O, special ed Momma dropped him on his head Now he's ...

When I was, A boy of ten I had a very best friend Fred was kind with good intent but just a little different Oooh, Special Fred mama dropped him on his head n...

watch them run, watch them fall, watch them try 2 catch a ballolympics, at the special olmypics watch them laugh, watch them drool, watch them fall into the poo...

Watch them run, watch them fall, watch them try to catch a ball,Oylmpicsat the special Oylimpics Watch them laugh, watch them drool, watch them fall into the po...

I came down to the breakfast table felt like I could die Tried so hard but wasn't able to look you in the eye For i'm feeling so much shame yes i have brought ...

Yeeeeeeeeeehaw! She's a tall glass'o water She's sip a lemonade She's a cup of hot darjeeling tea She's a cold tang in the shade She's an oatmeal cookie She's ...

I flagged him down at the corner And he picked me up at the light I told him where I was going And we drove off into the night "How's it going my friend?" I ask...

Have a seat and listen, please don't say a thing In matters of the heart sometimes, the truth will have a sting Just don't take it personally, this is no attack...

Voices in My Head Prelogue: You know, when you're up here and you're playing and having a good time and Looking down on you and all of your smiling faces, you t...

It's out of my hand's and all I can do is wait It's not knowing that has put me in this state The minute's feel like hours the tension is too great I've done my...

Hey it's Cristopher Walken Gerbil what kinda of song is that that's crazy There's no cowbell in Gerbil I neeed more cowbell Gerbil, We all, look Mr Lynch We all...

I'm sorry but I don't know what to do I just need more Cowbell Tall glass O'water is my favorite Because it has cowbell That's funny to you engineer man in the ...

Look whose guitars are these? move them around i have to be honost with you stephenlynchif that is your real name i heard the whole album look ur doughter ...

Where the f*** are my car keys They were right here in my hand I had them just a second ago Did I leave them in the kitchen Or underneath the cusions of the cou...

Where the fuck are my car keys? They were right here in my hand I had them just a second ago Did I leave them in the kitchen? Or underneath the cushins of the...

When grandfather dies life will be strange when grandfather dies my whole world will change when grandfather dies i'll scream and i'll yell coz i'll be f***in r...

In the woods of Northern Michigan he made his home Didn't ask much from the world, just wanted to be alone And got his first real blade at thirteen that's when ...

Hand in hand we walk the city Beneath the darkened skies Stealing kisses in the shadows away from prying eyes Hiding out from those we know Secrets whispers vo...

I came down to the breakfast table Felt like I could cry I tried so hard but wasn't able To Look you in the eye For I am feeling so ashamed Yes I have brought d...