Behind a cold coffee in a downtown cafe I was lookin' out Saw you in the crowd I noticed you wore a dark pair of shades Didn't know that man Though he held your...

All I want for Christmas is my methadone All I want for Christmas is to be left alone All I want for Christmas is a free ride home All I want for Christmas is h...

I am an astronaut falling through the night I am an astronaut lost beyond your sight I am an astronaut letting go and holding tight I am an astronaut just don't...

Strawberry pizza flavored lifesaver lover Hold me a little tighter honey underneath the covers I got a holographic heart shaped muscle in my chest That needs a ...

I am batman but you can call me Bo And when I see the boy wonder I say yo ro I used to wear a cape and do the leotard bit But now I wear all serious because I d...

We shared a good laugh We shared a tear or two And they can't take that away We shared the good times We shared the bad times too I know you want me to stay oh ...

Big butts and blow jobs They go together like The sun and the sky Like whiskey and rye Like ice cream and pie Like lovers and sighs Big butts and blow jobs Big...

When I saw you down at the lido It was a hot Saturday night You were on fire and I was burning up But just one look from you And I knew it would be alright It ...

Bruce lee pack punches like brown bag lunches He get busy on the bad guy now why you wanna flow fly Float like a butterfly sting you in the sphincter I got flav...

Shudokahn at the budokahn Flippin burgers down at wendy's trying to get my groove on My sphincter's clenched up tight Your looks only wet my appetite Realized I...

I don't want no hiv I don't want no bullets inside of me I don't want no dwi I don't want satan sticking that fork in my big eye I don't need no driveby in fro...

Mama got the cornbread Daddy got the sauce Daddy wear the pants But mamma she's the boss Daddy be up playing with the black cat bone Leaving poor mama at home...

Early morning beeping sound Gulp down breakfast and I'm gone Though I'm workin' hard all day Maybe I'm just greedy Maybe I'm just dum Maybe I'm just asking For ...

Lay on the grass beside me, crystal eyes You know you hypnotize me with your crystal eyes But I woke when I found out About your tiny little lies And I had to f...

I feel her presence I've seen her shadow late at night Heard her breathing Sending shivers down my spine Come the morning It'll be alright There must be demons ...

I know you're trying to drive me crazy I know you're doing a good job baby I know i can't seem to feel my fingers This feeling you're filling me up it lingers A...

I know i came home late last evening And my excuses you weren't believing But baby i love you you know that's the truth So let me step inside your telephone boo...

Don't you know I tried to make it right with you Well I should go after everything that we've been through I had the time of my life 'till the day that my luck ...

So they told you about the future baby They read it in your palm They knew it so well It seemed like a spell It was the calm before the storm You wish you neve...

Fuck me Baby won't you fuck me Fuck me Baby won't you fuck me I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I don't know what to say So fuck me Baby won't you fuck me F...

The sun's shinning And the skies are gray But I still know it's shinning Out there anyway And I'm lightning Crashing through the sky I got my feet on the groun...

I'M GOING TO THE H.E.B.! Yes! Yes, yes yall and you don't stop When I'm at the H.E.B. I like to buy my groceries I like to walk up & down the isles And check o...

I should have called you up I shouldn't have left you by yourself I should have you run you down I should have let you have your way I shouldn't have beaten you...

Hanging out with the horny girls That was kinda cool There was nothing I could think of That they wouldn't do They were quite bisexual And they were kind of na...

I gave you a hard time, I told you the news there's no "I'm sorries" 'cause there ain't no excuse the things I've been doin', the things that I say the road to...

How many times have I told you so That you are so hard to forget And how many times did I take the phone And you were already in bed Oh wow so hard to forget Oh...

People say there's a cure for feeling lonely People say all is fair in love and war Some tender passionate love Is really what you've been thinking of A secret ...

Her man, he's doing dishes Her diet is her God Her job, it gives her freedom New shirts, new skirts She's fixing cocktails in the weekend Don't she live a life?...

I fucked your daughter up the ass boy I fucked your mama too I fucked your granny in the alley I think I'll fuck you up too You're such a goddamn pussy I'll ma...

You could "?ve noticed by the way that I was tryin' to catch you eyes you could have known it "?cause I tried to start a conversation twice I was really excited...

I'm not the one you love I'm not the one you want I know it sucks but honey like it or not I'm the only one you've got I'm not the one you dig But I'm your mai...

Another dream soaked day floats by High and rolling through the world I fly Fly up to you to watch the wind blow down The gates that hold you to the ground And...

I know you've got boyfriends Baby I've seen them I know you don't care about Anybody but yourself But that doesn't matter to me Cause I'm the same way too Maybe...

I got my coffee and I got my coat I turn the keys and I hit the road It looks like rain and it's freezin' cold Feels like headin' for the twilight zone So keep ...

Here comes Johnny, macho man Hard top mustang, second hand A bottle of bourbon, the usual brand Looks like harley and the marlboro man John let Rosie eat from h...

One day I met Minnie Mouse She said baby, let's play house I said honey, I do more but What if Mickey comes knocking on the door She said honey, let's hit the s...

Neon light wanderin' around, feelin' alright crowded street pushers, pimps, it's the elite take a shot of brandy at the "?full moon bar' better take one for the...

Holy macaroni and the stutter jive king Used to run Chicago doing the gangster thing They'd keep that Smith and Wesson in the pocket of their pants And it weren...

One day I was wondering I didn't know what to do that day I stared at myself in the mirror I saw a Twentieth Century slave There I was in my back room There I w...

Been up all night Tryin' so hard to kill the time It seems the clock is running slow I can't deny The thought already crossed my mind To write my final goodbye ...

I got that freaky deaky sneaky sock it to me feelin baby If you want it come and get it cause I got it don't mean maybe I can rock it rock it baby rock it all t...

I was free form finger fucking Frieda Late one fiery Friday night My hands were getting lazy But I was driving Frieda crazy So I free form fucked her till the m...

By Bob Schneider Called the doctor on the telephone Said I got the fever, it won't leave me alone Called the doctor on the telephone Said I got the fever, it w...

They say Bill Wyman's got the blues On MTV they call it news They say he's just a rolling stone When he's home he's all alone When he's blue and feeling bad You...

Standin' by the store at a quarter to eight Just before opening time I look at my reflection gotta lose some weight First I need a bottle of wine Look at me now...

Tv dinner and tv news Leather jackets and cowboy boots Cut your hair, wear a suit Get an ulcer, eat fast food Keep on running 'cause you're always late Move up ...

When I see your head I see money I see a whole lot of money to be made When I see your head I see the sun shining On a million little people drinking lemonade ...

She's been scanning for males in the room She's been tanning and spraying perfume She got tricks up her sleeve and She's doin' her best to be noticed She's lea...

Some guys are sayin' she's dirty I heard 'em sayin' she's slick Girls are sayin' she's flirty And never misses a trick But she's a natural woman A very natural...

They call me sloppy jalopy I got a whole lot in my head I never get up early baby Just to get out of bed I eat the jalapeno yes I do And then I take a creamy dr...

You drive around in a brand new Mercedes While you're living in a shack And I've heard you're buying drinks for the ladies While the barman runs a ta And I don'...

I'm gonna tell a story and it goes like this Living my life and it was full of bliss I did not have a problem that I could not handle I kept my life nice and ti...

Suzie likes to walk the moon down on the ocean She likes to sing the birds to sleep in the trees & when they're asleep and tucked in and all out of sight Suzie ...

Now on the runway in la The girls be catching vapors and it's strictly hey hey And I say hey hey and they say who you And I say that I'm the man they callin mrs...

I met a woman down in Mexico Sweet as sugar with a heart made of stone We drank tequila by the light of the moon I didn't know that she would be my ruin She sai...

Once in a while I don't feel that fine I've got this feeling that they call the blues I know it's time to call the hot line I'm begging Candy, give me the news ...

There was a time when I loved you There was a time you loved me too There was a time we were both feeling good Now I don't know what to do You're letting me go ...

The headless samurai of Oatmogie, Oklahoma He's a crazy mother fucker who just woke from a coma He's screaming and he's dreaming and he just can't get to bed He...

You got me barkin' at your front door you got me runnin' wild like a little child you made me crazy, you made me creep humiliate me, way down deep you make me c...

I don't know if I can make you mine I don't know for sure if love is blind Have a heart girl, let me spoil you once for a day You may be smart, you've got the b...

I took a trip in my mind I turned water into wine in the sunshine I took a trip far away from the troubles of this maniac day Oh I breathed in the air and I swe...

Vampirella Baby let me tell Vampirella let me tell ya I'm the fella that you're looking for Vampirella Baby let me tell Vampirella let me tell ya I'm the fella...

I ain't gonna wait around now For you to come back down then try to fly away And watch the angels drag you back down to the ground Ain't gonna work it out ain'...

We come correct We come to rock we came to get down We came to get busy move your butts around Gaddamit we can 'cause we're strickly business When we in the hou...

I might be a man of riches Might be on top of the world But I'd still feel like a pauper If I wasn't with you girl I might be the king in the castle Might have ...

Who got the goodies? Scabs do! Who always sport the woodies? Scabs do! So why you wanna settle for a snack? When you can have the whole buffet There's a brand ...

Now you can tell a woman what she might want to hear Whisper sweet nothing's into her ear Buy her diamonds and buy her pearls Buy her everything in the world A...

She buys hem food and clothing she does his laundry she washed stinking shirts and she gets nothing in return he's out there earning wages talking dirty all the...

Well the rain makes you feel lonely When you're down and on your own And maybe it's cold comfort But I do want you to know When the blues ticks on your window A...

Tell me how you could have been so cruel Don't you know that you were all I had And when you see your lover lying in a pool Of his own blood don't think me mad ...

At first you were unwanted you were disgusting and snarly You were terribly unwieldy you were stinky you were gnarly You acted like a baby and you acted like a ...