Hey, brother Christian with your high and mighty errand
Your actions speak so loud, I can't hear a word you're saying
Hey, sister bleeding heart with all of your compassion
Your labors soothe the hurt but can't as wage temptation

Hey, man of science with your perfect rules of measure
Can you improve this place with the data that you gather?
Hey mother Mercy can your loins bear fruit forever?
Is your fecundity a trammel or a treasure?

And I wanna conquer the world
Give all the idiots a brand new religion
Put an end to poverty, uncleanliness, and toil

Promote equality in all of my decisions
With a quick wink of the eye
And a God you must be joking

Hey mister diplomat with your worldly aspirations
Did you see your children cry when you left them at the station?
Hey moral soldier, you've got righteous proclamations
And precious tomes to fuel your pulpy conflagrations

And I wanna conquer the world
Give all the idiots a brand new religion
Put an end to poverty, uncleanliness, and toil
Promote equality in all of my decisions

I want to conquer the world
Expose the culprits and feed them to the children
Do away with air pollution and then I'll save the whales
We'll have peace on earth and global communion

I wanna conquer the world
I want to conquer the world
I wanna conquer the world
I want to conquer the world!