Princess resuscitates drowning tramp
Big business infiltrates postage stamp
Happy days are here again
And it's a gas man, oh boy
And we will enjoy ourselves

Illiterate bored teenager gets spelling wrong on suicide note
Loneliness of long distance drugs runner
Ends on crowded Bangkok death row
Happy days, oh happy days
And it's a gas man, oh boy
And we will enjoy ourselves

Over and over the sums are the same
Count up the number of people in pain
Take away friends and then add a few noughts
Dividing it by the first number you thought
And it's a gas man

Kill yourself if you want
But I'll tell you this only once
Don't