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me and my buddy got us a wild hair and figured we wanted to go somewhere so we loaded up in my ragtop chevrolet we had a lil' bit of money and a whole lot of show and with hank jr. blarin on the radio we had a tank full of gas and we was on our way
we figured we'd go down to new orleans we were barrelling old 17 when a man with a red blinking light was on our tail he said you were doing 60 in a 45 but i'm gonna let you go this time but if i catch u again i'm gonna slap you up in the county jail we said thank you sir you sure been nice and you aint gonna have to tell us twice and we southbound down with the wind blowin in our faces we kept on rollin and pretty soon the radio was cookin' out a haggard tune and we were pullin into houston checkin out all them places
i was feelin dry and i said i think we ought to stop and give ourselves a drink and o' jim said yeah cuz we got time to kill we kept on rollin and i seen this spot so we pulled into the parking lot of this place called the cloud nine bar and grill
we walked through the door the place was jammed the lights were low they had a punk rock band and some orange-haired fella singin 'bout suicide i said jim this ain't our kinda place he said well let's just have one-round any ways so against my better judgement we walked on inside went up to the bar and we sat down this fellar walked up and said i'll buy this round and he sat down on the barstoll next to jim
he looked like a girl but he talked like a guy had lipstick on and mascera in his eye and everybody in that place looked just about like him i said jim this ain't our kind of bar let's just go and back in get back in the car cuz theirs gonna be trouble aint no since in takin a chance we was gettin up gettin ready to leave in somebody grabbed o' jim by the sleeve and this good lookin girl was askin my buddy to dance
i said jim don't do it theirs somethin missin theirs fellars dancin and fellars kissin theris a fellar in high heeled shoes wearin panty hose he said partner i just cant turn this down you just go over there and have one more round and i'll dance with a lady and we'll get on down the road
so he walked away and left me alone but this funny lookin fellar kept comin on and he was makin me mad in said and then he put his hand on my knee i said if you dont get your paw off me i'm gonna locate your nose around on the side of your head
he said i love it when yout that fire in your eyes i said well partner try this on for size and i unloaded on him and he went out like a light everybody in that place must've been his friend they all headed for me i said this is the end but where i come from we don't give up without a fight
they were screaminand yellin and scrathin and clawin i was punchin and hittin and kickin and pawin i was holdin my own cuz i've been in a scrap or two o' jim comin runnin up out of the blue and that gal he was with comin runnin up 2 and proceeded to beat on me with a high heel shoe
i grabbed her by the hair it come off in my hand and that girl beautiful girl was just a beautiful man and o' jim just got sick right there on the floor
he dropped that dude like as hot from a gun smeared his lipstick made his makeup run and me and o'l jim started fightin our way to the door
we lit out of there in that chevrolet put it on the floor and it stayed that way we were goin down the highwaydoin bout a 110 we were headed for home and we was gettin nearer then a red light came on the rear view mirror and that same blame cop pulled us over again
now i'm sittin here in this county jail had to call my daddy to go our bail but i learned a lesson i never will forget agaain i done give up drinkin i give up bars and runnin around the country in souped up cars i'm goin back here the women are women and the men are men
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