You ain't Dolly, and you ain't Porter
She's a little bit fuller
Yeah, well, you're a whole lot shorter
Let's dance all night,
And fill the jukebox full of quarters
'Cause you ain't Dolly,
No, and you ain't Porter

I noticed you right off the bat in them cowboy boots
Who couldn't help but see you in that rhinestone suit
Well, that's 'cause I'm the reigning queen of karaoke night
Well, if I get drunk enough to sing, hell, I just might

Well, don't you worry now, cowboy, 'cause I'll get you through
We'll sing a cheating song just like they used to do

'Cause You ain't Dolly, and you ain't Porter
She's a little bit fuller
Well, sweetheart, you're a whole lot shorter
Let's dance all night,
And fill the jukebox full of quarters
'Cause you ain't Dolly,
No, and you ain't Porter

You'll probably seen me country singing on "The Voice" someday
Yeah, and I'm the guy they wrote about in "Fifty Shades of Grey"
Why don't you come on back to my place, and you can have your way
Baby, that sounds tempting, but I can't stay

Oh, we won first prize, cowboy, let's just split the dough
Honey, I will always love you, but we'll never know

You ain't Dolly, babe, you ain't no Porter
She's a little bit fuller
And you're a damned sight shorter
Let's danced all night,
And filled the jukebox full of quarters
'Cause you ain't Dolly,
No, and you ain't Porter

No, no, you ain't Dolly
No, and you ain't Porter