[Originally By Panic At! The Disco]

Oh,
Well imagine,
As I'm pacing the pews in a church corridor,
And I can't help but to hear,
No, I can't help but to hear an exchanging of words:

"What a beautiful wedding! What a beautiful wedding," says a bridesmaid to the waiter,
"And, yes, but what a shame, what a shame the poor groom's bride is a whore"

I chime in with a,
"Haven't you people ever heard of closing the Goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things
With a sense of poise and rationality
I chime in,
"Haven't you people ever heard of closing the Goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things
With a sense of

Oh, Well in fact,
Well I'll look at this way,
I mean technically our marriage is saved,
Well this calls for,
A toast so,
Pour the champagne

Oh! Well in fact,
Well I'll look at it this way,
I mean technically our marriage is saved,
Well this calls for a toast,
So pour the champagne, pour the champagne!

I chime in with a,
"Haven't you people ever heard of closing the Goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things
With a sense of poise and rationality
I chime in,
"Haven't you people ever heard of closing the Goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things
With a sense of
Poise and Rationality!

I chime in,
"Haven't you people ever heard of closing the Goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things
With a sense of poise and rationality
I chime in,
"Haven't you people ever heard of closing the Goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things
With a sense of
Poise and Rationality! Again