Wish I was a man on a western land
I'd dig my spurs into the western sand
I'd dig on the view across the big red sky
Dig my ax into a pine and watch the chips fly

I'm gonna go, this time I know,
City's got me feeling like a motherfuckah!
This one is it, after I quit,
I can't write a love song worth shit!

I wish I was a Viking in 1103
I'd fuck up shit on the high cold sea
Did you know that the Vikings were always ripped?
They kept a lot of drugs on their dragonships

I wish I had a tape recorder
I'd tape everything I ever said
Nothing ever comes out right