Dinner table chattering classes -
Tells us all we need to know
Like it Lump it Dig it Dump it -
On your late, late show

And do you think you're Ralitsa Vassileva?
You're just hand-me-down news in a cookie jar
It's a long way from here to CNN in America
And a red-eyed opinion too far

Dish the dirt or dish the gravy
Spill the beans to me
Sinking fast in terminal boredom –
Feigned interest flying free

And do you think you're Ralitsa Vassileva etc

Talking monkey, breaking news junkie, tragedies to reveal
Light and breezy, up-beat squeezy, close in to touchy-feel

Pass the Merlot, dance the three-step
Cut to a better chase
Align yourself with no proposition
And simpler thoughts embrace

Let's talk about me Let's talk about you
In a world of private rooms
Hide awhile from dark stormbringers –
Sad messengers of doom

Sadly, you can't be Ralitsa Vassileva,

And do you think you're Ralitsa Vassileva,