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I turned on the TV set to check up on Battle of the Planets At seven a.m. on Saturday But G-Force and Mr. Magoo went the way of the New Zoo Revue And all my Super Friends have gone away Daphne, Fred and Velma, what am I to do? You've gone and left me hanging out with Scooby-Dum and Scrappy-Doo All the countless hours we spent watching Jimmy Olsen, Lois, Perry and Clark Kent I guess George Reeves wasn't bulletproof after all Oh Captain Kangaroo they broke the Creepy Crawler Mold after they made you And Mr. Moose ran out of ping-pong balls My Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots have seen better days And Mom just went and threw my Archie comics away CHORUS: I'm gonna cry if I can't find my View Master Etch-a-Sketch me a pretty picture Go Speed Racer go a little faster I could hear the voices of my childhood When I traded in my Close and Play for a second-hand guitar I was straining to hear, I was straining to reach them But Stretch Armstrong couldn't stretch that far Slinkies and Slurpees and Crazy Straws The Easter Bunny and Santa Claus A Shogun Warrior, a Weeble, and Evel Knievel I opened my blue toy box and found a couple dead spiders and a pair of old socks My Batman costume didn't seem to fit All my Star Wars guys are gone except a headless Tusken Raider and the Carbon Frozen Han And Boba's still digesting in my sandbox Sarlacc pit My NHL Slot Hockey is rusting underneath my bed My Hungry Hungry Hippo's starving, it's been years since he was fed I can't believe it's been so long since I stayed up past my bedtime just to play a game of Pong My Sit and Spin has got me in a whirl Was it twenty years ago that I'd get up once a week to watch the Krofft Supershow With Electra Woman and Dynagirl? I can hear the Sleestak pounding at my door Since Puff the Magic Dragon ceased his mighty roar CHORUS: I'm gonna cry if I can't find my View Master Spirograph me a pretty picture Go Speed Racer go a little faster I could hear the voices of my childhood When I traded in my Close and Play for a second-hand guitar I was straining to hear, I was straining to reach them But Stretch Armstrong couldn't stretch that far
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