I turned on the TV set to check up on Battle of the Planets
At seven am on Saturday
But G-Force and Mr Magoo went the way of the New Zoo Revue
And all my Super Friends have gone away
Daphne, Fred and Velma, what am I to do?
You've gone and left me hanging out with Scooby-Dum and Scrappy-Doo
All the countless hours we spent
watching Jimmy Olsen, Lois, Perry and Clark Kent
I guess George Reeves wasn't bulletproof after all
Oh Captain Kangaroo
they broke the Creepy Crawler Mold after they made you
And Mr Moose ran out of ping-pong balls
My Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots have seen better days
And Mom just went and threw my Archie comics away
CHORUS:
I'm gonna cry if I can't find my View Master
Etch-a-Sketch me a pretty picture
Go Speed Racer go a little faster
I could hear the voices of my childhood
When I traded in my Close and Play for a second-hand guitar
I was straining to hear, I was straining to reach them
But Stretch Armstrong couldn't stretch that far
Slinkies and Slurpees and Crazy Straws
The Easter Bunny and Santa Claus
A Shogun Warrior, a Weeble, and Evel Knievel
I opened my blue toy box
and found a couple dead spiders and a pair of old socks
My Batman costume didn't seem to fit
All my Star Wars guys are gone
except a headless Tusken Raider and the Carbon Frozen Han
And Boba's still digesting in my sandbox Sarlacc pit
My NHL Slot Hockey is rusting underneath my bed
My Hungry Hungry Hippo's starving, it's been years since he was fed
I can't believe it's been so long
since I stayed up past my bedtime just to play a game of Pong
My Sit and Spin has got me in a whirl
Was it twenty years ago
that I'd get up once a week to watch the Krofft Supershow
With Electra Woman and Dynagirl?
I can hear the Sleestak pounding at my door
Since Puff the Magic Dragon ceased his mighty roar
CHORUS:
I'm gonna cry if I can't find my View Master
Spirograph me a pretty picture
Go Speed Racer go a little faster
I could hear the voices of my childhood
When I traded in my Close and Play for a second-hand guitar
I was straining to hear, I was straining to reach them
But Stretch Armstrong couldn't stretch that far