Tall Texan: Well I'm a tall, tall Texan
I'm talking tall, tall, tall
(He comes from Texas and he's really tall)
I change a light bulb easy
I play great basketball
(He's great at light bulbs and at basketball)
Even the longest long-johns
Are always way too small
(The longest long-johns always way too small)

Short Texan: Well, I'm a short, short Texan
I'm talking real petite
(He comes from Texas and he's real petite)
I've tripped my share of bad guys
So better watch your feet
(He trips up bad guys, better watch your feet)
Even one tiny little meatball
Is way too big to eat
(One tiny meatball's way too big to eat)

Tall Texan: Yeah, when I drop my toothpick
There's just one guy to call

Short Texan: Ya call a short, short Texan
'Cause it's too low for y'all
And when I need some boosting
To hop onto my horse

Tall Texan: You call a tall, tall Texan
Like your buddy, of course
Well, I'm a tall, tall Texan
Hitting the dusty trail
(He's a tall Texan 'bout to hit the trail)

Short Texan: Beside a short, short Texan
We stick together without fail
(They're gonna stick together without fail)

Both: We'd like to thank you folks for listenin'
To this here short tall tale

Short Texan: Yeee-haw