Have you seen him on the corner
And his lip would reach the pavement
He's been hiding from his razor,
Is he not an awful sight?
In love he was the purist,
How he's frightening our tourists
If he'd gone and asked his father
Oh, I'm sure he'd set him right, sayin'

"Take her in your arms
And tell her that you love her,
Take her in your arms
And hold that woman tight
Won't you take her in your arms
And tell her that you love her
If you're going to love a woman
Then be sure you do it right"

Now he met her at a disco
In a dive in San Francisco
And it all might have been different
Had he seen her in daylight
She was painted, she was scented,
But she drove your man demented
If he'd gone and asked his father
Oh, I'm sure he'd set him right, sayin'

Here's a pub with fun and laughter
The landlord's buying bevvy
There's a session in the corner
And the crack is grand tonight,
But your man who's lost his woman,
He's still at home lamenting
If he'd gone and asked his father
Oh, I'm sure he'd set him right, sayin'

Now, depression's not a million laughs
But suicide's too dangerous
Don't go leppin' out of buildings
In the middle of the night
It's not the fall --- but landin'
That'll alter social standin'
So go first and ask your father
Oh, I'm sure he'll set you right, sayin'

Here's a health to all true lovers,
Their sisters and their brothers,
And their uncles and their grannies,
For this thing is black and white
If you're keen to start romancin'
With it's leppin' and it's dancin'
Then go first and ask your father
And I'm sure he'll set you right, sayin'