Songeriter: Hoyt Axton

I'm the cop in a little bitty town
And I don't get much pay
Oh, but I caught seventeen out-of-state cars
And four of my friends today

Yeah, I let the hometwon boys go home
They paid five dollars bail
Oh, but all the drivers in the out-of-sate cars
Had to go to jail

Yeah, they hollered and they moaned, they cried and they groaned
They all swore that they'd sue
But the judge was high, and so was I
And we needed the money due

Yeah, the judge and me got a deal, you see
We split the money fair
'Cept thirty percent to the county seat
Keep the law out of our hair

And ol' Charlie's workin' out real good at down at the corner store where
the red light is. He sees them out-of-state plates two blocks away. When
they get right on top of that green light, ol' Charlie pushes that secret
button underneath the corner drug store counter. And that yellow light only
lasts for a tenth of a second.

Yeah, the county pays me about fourty a week
Ain't that the livin' end
If it wasn't for them tourists in them out-of-state cars
I'd have no loot to spend

But the way it stands this year so far,
I've made four hundred thou
For a high school dropout, I'm doin' fine
I'm makin' more than the president now

For a high school dropout, I'm doin' fine
I'm makin' more than the president now

So if you're drivin' down the road
And a flashin' light you see
If they're on top of a red Rolls-Royce
You can bet your boots it's me

'Cause I'm the cop in a little bitty town
And I'd sure like to see
All you drivers in them out-of-state cars
Try to get by me