with a pocket full of candy
and a bookcase full of porn
you buy stacks and stack of Hustlers
bags and bags of candy corn

when i see you at the beach
you've be looking in the sand
wearing shades and baggy pants
with a camera in your hand

you're a pervert a pervert
you think you're a ladies man
you're a pervert a pervert
don't wanna shake your hand

the junior high school car wash
you're always first in line
hey those teenage cheerleaders sure look fine
huh huh mmhum huh hum hum hum

you're a pervert a pervert
moustache and sweaty palms
you're a pervert a pervert
it just goes on and on

it just goes on and on
on and on

you could meet a girl
and that girl could be your wife
and you can have a family
and lead a normal
you could live like the rest
by the golden rule

but you would rather play with yourself out behind the grammar school!

you're a pervert a pervert
you think you're a ladies man
you're a pervert a pervert
don't wanna shake your hand

you're a pervert a pervert
moustache and sweaty palms
you're a pervert a pervert
it just goes on and on