Monogram: Perry the platypus
Is a lovely shade of teal
From his duck-billed nose
To his web-bed toes
And his nerves were made of steel.

Carl: What does this have to do with Christmas?

Monogram: Well, I'm just describing him so that people have a mental
Picture. It matches the original song.

The night before Christmas
Was a crisis at the Pole
Cause old Doofenshmirtz
He had done his worst
And a sleigh that day, he stole

Doof too it on a joyride
Just as far as he was able
But Doof, that goof, lost control
Ran into the reindeer stable

Now all the reindeer
Were on crutches or in traction
So old Agent P
He knew that he must spring right into action

Look at that platypus
Look at that platypus
Look at that platypus go
Look at that platypus
Look at that platypus
Flying o'er the snow

Carl: O'er sir?
Monogram: It's a contraction. It means over.
Carl: It's a bit archaic.
Monogram: It's traditional Carl, get o'er it.

So the reindeer were out of commission
And Santa's sleigh was trashed
I'd explain it more
But we've been there before
It doesn't need to be rehashed

Santa Claus was freaking out
Thought he'd have to scrap his run
He was torn inside
For without a ride
He knew Christmas Day was done

But then o'er the horizon
Came a light bright as a star
Cutting through the night
Was the two headlights
Of Perry's hovercar

Perry the platypus
Had a mission at the Pole
If he could lend a hand in the frozen land
He'd help Santa reach his goal

There must have been some magic in that platypus-themed hovercar
For when Santa saw the gas gauge
He knew it could take him far

Carl: Really sir?
Monogram: They want this album yesterday, alright?

Perry the platypus
Took Santa on his way
And he came through
Like we knew he'd do
And saved our Christmas Day