Dear Abbey,
Got a problem I'm a decent, underpaid hardworking county coroner
It's important that my family eat meat at least 3 times a week
But we can't afford to with the prices the way they are So I bring home choice cuts
from my autopsy subjects Just mix in the Tuna Helperand TA-DA!!

The Whole family thinks my new meals are delicious
They ask me what's my secret Abby, I think they are getting suspicious
My smart ass 8 year old keeps asking,
"Where's all the meat? The red dye #2 kind that's kept in the fridge"
If they found out the truth I don't think they'll understand Abby, what do
I tell my family?

DEAR REAGANOMICS VICTIM: Consult your clergyman Make sure
the body is blessed and everything should be just finejust fine