[Originally by Regina Spektor]

A man walks out of his apartment,
It is raining, he's got no umbrella
He starts running beneath the awnings,
Trying to save his suit,
Trying to save his suit
Trying to dry, and to dry, and to dry but no good

When he gets to the crowded subway platform,
He takes off both of his shoes
He steps right into somebody's fat loogie
And everyone who sees him says, "Ew"
Everyone who sees him says, "Ew"

But he doesn't care,
'Cause last night he got a visit from the
Ghost of Corporate Future
The ghost said, "Take off both your shoes
Whatever chances you get
Especially when they're wet"

He also said,
"Imagine you go away
On a business trip one day
And when you come back home,
Your children have grown
And you never made your wife moan,
Your children have grown
And you never made your wife moan"

"And people make you nervous
You'd think the world is ending,
And everybody's features have somehow started blending
And everything is plastic,
And everyone's sarcastic,
And all your food is frozen,
It needs to be defrosted"

"You'd think the world was ending,
You'd think the world was ending,
You'd think the world was ending right now
You'd think the world was ending,
You'd think the world was ending,
You'd think the world was ending right now"

"Well maybe you should just drink a lot less coffee,
And never ever watch the ten o'clock news,
Maybe you should kiss someone nice,
Or lick a rock,
Or both"

"Maybe you should cut your own hair
'Cause that can be so funny
It doesn't cost any money
And it always grows back
Hair grows even after you're dead"

"And people are just people,
They shouldn't make you nervous
The world is everlasting,
It's coming and it's going
If you don't toss your plastic,
The streets won't be so plastic
And if you kiss somebody,
Then both of you'll get practice"

"The world is everlasting
Put dirtballs in your pocket,
Put dirtballs in your pocket,
And take off both your shoes
'Cause people are just people,
People are just people,
People are just people like you
People are just people,
People are just people,
People are just people like you"

The world is everlasting
It's coming and it's going
The world is everlasting
It's coming and it's going
It's coming and it's going