I love to smoke I love to smoke and I love to eat red meat I love to eat raw fucking red meat Nothing I like better than sucking down a hot steaming cheese burger and a butt at the same time I love to smoke I love to eat red meat I'll only eat red meat that comes from cows who smoke, ok!? Special cows they grow in Virginia with voice boxes in their necks "[VB] Moo"
I tried eating vegetarian I feel like a wimp going into a restaurant "What do you want to eat sir? Brocolli?" Brocolli's a side dish, folks Always was, always will be, ok? When they ask me what I want, I say, "What do you think I want!? This is America I want a bowl of raw red meat right now Forget about that Bring me a live cow over to the table I'll carve off what I want and ride the rest home! [Making riding noises]"
I gonna open up my own place Open my own restaurant and get away from you people I gonna open up a restaurant with two smoking sections; Ultra and Regular, ok? And we're not gonna have any tables or any chairs or any napkins None of that pussy shit Just a big wide open black space And all we're gonna serve is raw meat, right on the bone! And only men are going to eat there, naked men, sitting around a big giant camp fire, and no men's room either You have to piss, you mark your territory like a wolf! And if some guy has a heart attack from eating too much meat, fuck him, we throw him in the fire! More meat for the other meat-eaters! Yeah!
Because you gotta have goals Because everybody in this room knows everybody who's quitting You all have that friend who's quitting it You know what I mean? The guys quitting it, "I quit smoking I quit drugs I quit drinking I quit meat, and I feel great I get up in the morning and have a nice big bowl of oat bran I go to the bathroom for three and a half hours I have another bowl of oat bran I go back in the bathroom f