Theo:
But if a monster came in the room tonight
What would we do? What could we do?
If he tried to make your hair turn white with fright
What would you do? If it was you?

Alvin:
I'd drown him with my soaker gun,
Glue him to a chair,
Put a dead skunk in his pocket
I'd knock him off his feet
with a Judo sweep
Blast him into space on a rocket
I'd send him to his doom
If a monster came in my room

Spoken (Alvin):
Yo Zipper Face, you wanna piece of me?
Y'all ready to rumble?
Bring it on brother

Theo:
But if a monster sat of the edge of the bed
What would you do? What could you do?

Alvin:
With a zipper in his neck
And bolts in his head

Simon:
If it were me? Well, let me see
I'd multiply pie by his height and his weight
to determine mathematically
The way to alter his molecular state
And shrink him to the size of a flea
I'd fill him full of dread
If a monster sat on my bed

All:
Ain't no monster gonna put us down
Uh uh No way
We'll chase his face right out of town
That's what we say
Ain't no monster gonna put us down
Uh huh That's right
"?Cause we're the meanest munks around
We're tight!

Spoken (Dave):
Simon, Theodore, Alvin!
Go to sleep!

Alvin:
Oh-kay! *slams door*
I am the mont-inator (tor, tor, tor)
If a monster came in and decided to stay

Theo:
That wouldn't be very nice
We could ask him politely to go away

Alvin:
Are we munks? Or are we mice?
I'll stick him in the ribs with my pirate sword
Shoot silly string at his head

Simon:
I'll use my blanket like a madador

Theo:
I'll just hide under my bed

Alvin & Simon:
No!

All:
We'll make him face his doom
If a monster comes in our room
We'll send him to his doom
If a monster comes in our room
We'll blow him up, KABOOM!

Spoken (Dave):
I thought I told you boys to go to sleep!

All: *quietly*
If a monster comes in our room
We'll send him to his doom
If a monster comes in our room
We'll blow him up "?

Theo: *shouts*
KABOOM!

Alvin & Simon: *clap hands over Theodore's mouth*
If a monster comes in our room