"Alright class I'm the Professor I'm going to be giving you the lecture today Now, just so that we're all clear, this is Gallifreyan History 101, so please make sure you're in the right class
"There's always one, isn't there?
"Right, for the rest of us, we've got a lot to cover, so let's get started"

At first we were just Gallifreyans and that was fine
Just taking up space and biding our time
Till Rassilon came along
With his ever present sense of right and wrong
He was strong, he was mighty,
He was the founder of Time Lord Society

Now this is the subject that everyone finds the hardest
But you're gonna have to pass it if you want to earn your TARDIS
Nobody's graduating from this Academy
Until you've all mastered Gallifreyan History
Gallifreyan History

Now Rassilon had a buddy called Omega;
His interstellar science would amaze ya
He found our source of power
And devised a cunning plan in under an hour
It went sour, he was erased
But at least now we could travel through time and space

Now if there's a subject that's impossible, it's this
In comparison, the Untempered Schism's a piece of piss
Nobody's graduating from this Academy
Until you've all mastered Gallifreyan History
Gallifreyan History

So now we're all Time Lords, and that's just fine
We're travelling through space, bouncing through time
But we've made it clear not to interfere,
And that's a rule to which we all must adhere
But I fear that the Doc
Is about causing havoc in his big blue box

Now that brings up to date and everything's just gravy
I just hope it doesn't get messed up by Russell T Davies
Nobody's graduating from this Academy
Until you've all mastered Gallifreyan
Until you can say you're Gallifreyan
Until you know all about Gallifreyan History