(Michael) I never thought I'd get this far
(Audience) We always knew you would

(Michael) I've put a little weight on

(Audience) Not really, it looks good

(Michael) These lines around my mouth are new

(Audience) They're the lines of wisdom

(Michael) This puffiness around my eyes?

(Audience) The burden of the kingdom!

(Michael) You know I like to talk with you

(Audience) We do too, we never knew

Someone who we could talk to
Who was quite as smart as you

We would like to hear you talk all night
But tell us if we might
Interrupt you with applause
If you should chance to pause
We would love to rock the walls
Again and again with curtain calls
And a standing ovation
For your brilliant conversation

(Michael) Clap, clap!

Now silence

Have you noticed people wear

(Audience) Copies of your favourite hat?

(Michael) You have noticed that my dears?

(Audience) O yes we have noticed that

(Michael) They wear copies of my shoes

(Audience) Two by twos they wear your shoes

(Michael) And they like to sing my blues

(Audience) Echoes of your ah's and ooh's

(Michael) You know I like to talk with you

(Audience) We do too, we never knew

Someone who we could talk to
Who was quite as smart as you

(Michael) I'm afraid that I've become

For nearly everyone
A model of behaviour
A devil or a saviour

(Audience) He's afraid that he's become
For next to nearly everyone
The very latest model of behaviour
He's a devil, he's a saviour
-a