Got out of bed, wasn't feeling too good
With my wallet and my passport, a new pair of shoes
The sun is shining so I head for the park
With a bottle of Tequila, and a new pack of cigarettes

I got a cousin and she got a friend
Who thought that her aunt knew a man who could help
At his apartment I knocked on the door
He wouldn't come out until he got paid
Now don't tell anybody what I wanna do
If they find out you know that they'll never let me through

It's no fun being an illegal alien
It's no fun being an illegal alien

Down at the office had to fill out the forms
A pink one, a red one, the colours you choose
Up to the counter to see what they think
They said "It doesn't count man, it ain't written in ink"
Don't trust anybody least not around here, cos

It's no fun being an illegal alien
It's no fun being an illegal alien
It's no fun being an illegal alien
It's no fun being an illegal alien
An illegal alien, OK

Consideration for your fellow man
Wouldn't hurt anybody, sure fits in with my plan
Over the border, there lies the promised land

So don't tell anybody what I wanna do
If they find out you know that they'll never let me through

It's no fun being an illegal alien
It's no fun being an illegal alien
It's no fun being an illegal alien
It's no fun being an illegal alien