[dial tone]

[recorded message]

hello thank you for calling distubing the peace
to help expidite your call please listen carfuly to the following options:
if your calling to send us in a demo tape, press 1
if youre calling regarding a job, press 2
if youre calling to borrow money, press 3
if youre calling to find the nearest weed spot in your area, press 4
if youre out of alcohal on sunday, press 5
if you need a ho for an evening, press 6
if you woke up with a hangover and a pair of hairy balls on your forehead, press 7
[presses 7]

you just pressed 7! youve been introduced and victimized to a moral crime called t-baggin
we suggest you promtly hang up the phone,
beat the ass of any white guys you hung out with last night
then find and destroy all photos before they apear on the internet

thank you for calling
good luck
good bye