Call the number on your screen
Talk to the girl of your dreams
Tell her how you really feel
You can't touch her, but she's real

1-900-loser
1-900-loser
1-900-loser
You're a loser

Spend all your money talking to that bitch
Can't pay your bills cause you're not rich
How long do you talk anyway
She does all the talking and look who pays

1-900-loser
1-900-loser
1-900-loser
You're a loser

1-900-loser
1-900-loser
1-900-loser
You're a loser

You're a loser, face the facts
She doesn't mean a word, it's just an act
Work all week, wait for the weekends
So you can go home and do it all again

1-900-loser
1-900-loser
1-900-loser
You're a loser

1-900-loser
1-900-loser
1-900-loser
You're a loser