Meet Henry, our hero, as horny as you can get
Sat down one Sunday night to make a mistress of the net
He finally got the guts to click the link he'd always seen
He had hand cream, paper towels and a squeegee for the screen

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Was it really that bad?
It was worse, it was worse
Was it really that bad?
It was worse, it was worse
I know you thought the last verse was perfectly perverse
Was it really that bad?
It was worse, worse, worse

His nooky knob began to throb when he saw the naughty nun
On her knees with the rosaries wrapped ‘round her father's fun
She asked the colored codger what the lord would have her do
The answer was a mouthful and an earful too

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Well he clicked and spanked and whacked and wanked for upwards of an hour
His semen sack ascended to the pinnacle of power
‘Til the next screen stopped his scratching in the middle of the itch
It was his daughter getting down with some horny little bitch

CHORUS

Now it wasn't so much the emerald dildo in her twat
Or that she wasn't a virgin – he'd taken care of that
Or that his little girl was taking pornographic pics
But the horny bitch in question was a multi-schnauzer mix

CHORUS