It's war I tell yer, I met some fellas
Who used to love you, but now they don't know you
My favourite cousin, who used to mean something
He played me records I've tried to forget
Like french and saunders, he talked for hours
Through costume dramas, watched by piranhas
And rows and rows and rows and rows of
Muppets staring straight at the sun
But I feel the force I'm dead of course
Enrolled on popular culture course
But I can't save nothing but world cup drumming
It stuck in my throat like it used to mean something
I feel the force I'm dead of course
Enrolled on popular culture course
But I can't save nothing but world cup drumming
And I polish it every day
It's war I tell yer, on fortune-tellers
On trumped-up charges, you always were the hardest
Me favourite brother, who used to be taller
He played me records, I'll only hear once
It's war