School's out, Christmas break
Home for the holidays, meatloaf and fruit cake
Off to Grandma's, it's so boring
Screaming kids, and grandpa snoring!
My aunt Margret's lost her mind!
Trippin on a train set, have another box of wine!!!
It's gonna be a merry, merry, merry frickin christmas!
I must be on Sana Clause's Shit List!
The tree, the gifts, the mistletoe kiss
Shoot, me now, I'm sick of all my relitives! (relitives, relitives!)
Have a merry, merry, merry frickin christmas!

Uncle Richard, He's a weirdo
Passing out pictures of himself in a speedo!
My cousin Ashly, her singing realy sucks!
Blames it on her drummer and her acid reflex!!
My brothers wife is realy hot!
She pulled me in the bathroom,
I hope we don't get cought!!
Its gonna be a merry, merry, merry frickin Christmas!
I must be on Santa Clause's Shit List!!
The tree, the gifts, the mistletoe kiss!
Shoot, me now! I'm sick of all my relitives!! (relitives, relitives!)
Have a merry, merry, merry frickin Christmas!!

We haven't even opened our presents yet,
Now it's time to start
I'll fake a smile, 'cause it's going back to Walmart

(sweetie, are you ok in there?) (ohhh)

Its gonna be a merry, merry, frickin Christmas!
I must be on Santa Clause's Shit List!!
Shoot, me now! I'm sick of all my relitives!! (relitives, relitives!)
Have a merry, merry, merry frickin Christmas!!\
Merry frickin Christmas!!!
(I'm Santa W Clause, and I approve this message!!)