You left a cooler at our house one night
So we're keeping it full of ice
On your advice
Blue ribbons and red wine
You know it's hard to find the right line
That does justice to the crime
Now the justice has declined
To take the stand this time
Well all the wasted space is mine
Yeah I hardly have the right to sing about it

Twelfth night and Halloween
An April Fool's bad dream
Cigar smoke over the moon
And you were leaving way too soon
Cheeto's and a hundred proof martinis on the roof
Cheeto's and a hundred proof martinis on the roof
And you were leaving too soon

You caught every book they threw
At you and your single malt recruits
With a Pipe shirt over your suit
Now the judges they love you too
And now we're crying in the house
Watching basketball on the couch
And we're trying to work it out
Yeah we're all trying to work it out
But you would not have us pout
Or sing about it

Twelfth night and Halloween
An April Fool's bad dream
Cigar smoke over the moon
And you were leaving way too soon
Cheeto's and a hundred proof martinis on the roof
Cheeto's and a hundred proof martinis on the roof
And you were leaving too soon

Yeah you left too soon