Why must you pick on me?
Have you no sympathy?
I'm just trying to get to school
I lack popularity, no friends to ride with me
So I'm alone in the car pool (lane)
When I saw those flashing lights,
When I heard you read my rights,
I knew this wasn't gonna be my day
So, Officer please don't ticket me,
My violation doesn't deserve a citation
Please, I won't bother you so don't bother me
"Sorry son but that's what I've got to do"
I'm tired of these stupid rules
I've got to waste my day at traffic school,
And on top of that I've got to pay a fine
The CHP likes to pick on me
They've got no sympathy
They're nothing but fat red neck swine
(Chorus)