In a town in southernmost Sicily Lived a family too proud to be poor In the year that fever took father away They hastened for American shores Now a mother and ...

Amos Moses was a Cajun And lived by himself in the swamp Hunting alligator for a living Knock 'em on the head with a stump The Louisiana law's gonna get you, Am...

The man he stepped up to the microphone and he gave it a kiss It was a big wet, slippery kiss And he had sweat dripping off of his nose onto the windscreen As h...

Bodacious am a whole lotta' bull Over nineteen hundred pounds He's born in Galry, Oklahoma And he's the baddest sonsabitch around If a Burma bull ever were a su...

I just want to satisfy you I would like to rectify you Pay no attention to what you've heard This mediocrity is so absurd but I won't listen to erratic advice D...

I had a friend that took a blet, took a blet and hung himself Hung himself in the doorway of the apartment where he lived His woman and his little bro came home...

Glad you came, glad you're here Have some champagne, imported beer Dig down in your dirt bag and roll us out a spleef Been erect here now for thirteen days and...

His momma used to dance at the Broadway shows Broadway, where the young men go to drop the coins in one, two, three He remembered walking in, not knowing apppl...

He's standin' tall at 5 foot 4, with the sharpness of a troubadour I dare you look him in the eye His stench would make a buzzard cry He likes Burt in White Li...

He wasn't lookin' for fanfare or fame But it all came around just the same He then met a girl with desire in her eye He gave her love, she took her name The ti...

Went down to Coddingtown to buy for Lucky Dog Moved on up to Sono-co to clear my head of smog People round town they all line up to buy them Chevrolets But me I...

Uno, Doce, Thriece! Mr Hamster and Hot Potato Man Turns the city on its ear Mr Hamster takes Hot Potato Man by the arm, Bombay Sapphire in his hand And Cohiba...

Oh I can still remember Jenny Hernando She was my little lovely one When I was seventeen I remember the day that she Gave me her viriginity And then she gave it...

Del Davis sold a Christmas tree Stood up to 8 feet tall Season was lookin' mighty thin He'd hoped to sell 'em all Here he comes with a dollar in his hand Repres...

Now, because you own, you possess, You have something that they can take You remember how it was when you had nothing, You looked at the ones that had what you ...

I woke up this morning with a bad hangover and my coochie was missing again This happens all the time: it's detachable This comes in handy a lot of the time: I ...

I'm a dog, a dirty flying dog I drink Campari with marinated wild hog I've no sense, I like electric fence I put barbed wire in my pants and do a celtic dance B...

I've been to hell I spell itI spell it DMV Anyone that's been there knows precisely what I mean Stood there and I've waited and choked back the urge to scream A...

Burnin', I feel a burnin' in my stomach, I wanna know if I'm a gonna make it If I don't just spread my ashes, if I do just spread your mind Swimmin', I see mys...

[Part I - Blinded by the Sun] Bring me back again, I'd really rather not be out here on my own Someone reel me in, I'm drifting ever farther from my home I re...

Brimming with all the hopes and desires of American youth, He set forth as a leader of sorts Just what sorts it is impossible to say at this time But he had the...

yeah yeah i am the plan i am the man who tells you what, and when you can i am the old one that torments you i am the voice that tells you too (chorus) don't...

Part I - Blinded by the Sun Bring me back again, I'd really rather not be out here on my own Someone reel me in, I'm drifting ever farther from my home I reme...

I am the plan, I am the man who tells you what and when you can I'm the old one that torments you I am the voice that tells you to: "Don't get caught with your...

I just can't seem to blend Into society I have no hope for this dim Simplicity of law and order By whose rules I see no rhyme in the reason I hold no hope for t...

The Eyes of the Squirrel are watching The Eyes of the Squirrel are watching The Eyes of the Squirrel are watching Barry swing his bat Piano playing Cats Big mou...

Felt a pang late one afternoon I was fishin' off Muir beach With Larry LeLonde Grabbed a tuna salad sandwich And I started to chew Pretty soon Ler's yellin Fish...

They found James Ambrose dead in his cell, a gaping gash in his arm had drained him down to hell No one knew for sure if Ambrose was his name They called him Ya...

Hello all you boys and girls I'd like to take you to the inside world It's quite an irregular place to be But never fear you're safe with me Well, maybe Golden ...

All the time talkin' 'bout the insiration Best leave off about the rhyme Along comes a boy, He's filled with adulation Specualtes if now is not the time She wa...

He stood in line with the rest And waited got his chance To take his place behind the glass And watch the ladies dance It's the nature of things He stepped in...

He was a mighty golden boy, as gold as ever seen, but when he stepped up to the podium, you could tell that boy was mean His arms was made of nickel, and his fo...

As I stand in the Shower Singing Opera and such Pondering the possibility that I Pull the pud too much There's a scent that fills the air Is it flatus? Just a t...

I took a ride with the Green Ranger, Stepped up and showed me lots of things. He'd liquefy my eye and slice it up like pie, Now at night my right ear always rin...

Slice me up a big slab of that sympathetic cheer If I'm zapped with radiation they say I'll last another year Line 'em up now to greet the sacred cow My hands...

When I woke up this mornin' I felt a pang I was hungerin' for some apple pie Stumble in the bathroom, hung my hog a little bit Washed the sleep out of my eye Oh...

It was a weekend's eve, I had sex on my breath I was lookin' for somethin' to see With a borrowed black leather and my best fishin' hat Well it was just Wendy O...

When I was born, the doc he held me by my ankles smacked my red behind They hosed me down, wrapped me like a bean burrito then marked the date and time Hats of...

Come in here, dear boy, have a cigar You're gonna go far, fly high, You're never gonna die, you're gonna make it if you try; they're gonna love you Well, I've a...

Lonely, lonely boy they called him Lucy, Mama's little man, And she calls him Hendershot, his mam called him Hendershot Be seen and not be heard, they told him...

Well you can ride the hennenpin crawler for a dollar Peddle it around the world You can ride the hennepin crawler for a dollar Impress them steam punk girls If ...

Here they come Here come the bastards I heard it from a confident - Who heard it form a confidant They're definately on their way There's one with this idea Som...

He came to conquer what he could, but he held back 'Cause his tongue was tired and shy So he laid the money down and he drank up, put the sparkle in his eye Sit...

Pick a name, pick a place, chances are I've had the means to be there Pick a date, pick a time, I got it from a friend of mine, the ability to socialize Holy Ma...

I know something about opening windows and doors I know how to move quietly to creep across creaky wooden floors I know where to find precious things in all you...

Is It Luck? My socks and shoes always match Is it Luck? There's a foot at the end of each of my legs Is it Luck? I can play my bass for you Is it Luck? Some gal...

I just want to satisfy you I would like to rectify you Pay no attention to what you've heard This mediocrity is so absurd But I won't listen to erratic advice D...

Jerry was a race car driver And he drove so goddamned fast He never did win no checkered flag But he never did come in last Jerry was a race car driver He'd say...

Jilly's on smack, and she won't be comin' back No she won't be comin' back, for the holidays Jilly's on smack, and she won't be comin' back No she won't be comi...

When he was young you'd not find him doing well in school His mind would turn unto the waters Always the focus of adolescent ridicule, He has no time for farmer...

A B C D E F G H I gotta' gal wears her toenails long Drives a red Barracuda, singin' meat packer songs And she ain't from Kalamazoo A B C D E F G H I gotta' fr...

The river water diverts to other places To nurture central valley seeds The northern waters that slosh desert fairways Fulfill So-Cal golfers needs The Mighty ...

Got a badge, a Red Rider at Rocket Camp out at (?Nohack?) Peak Lookin' for jailbirds left and right tryin'a knock 'em up out the trees Everybody I know's watchi...

You bastard Here they come, here they come, here they come, here they come, here they come, here they come, here they come, here they come, here they come, her...

We're only making plans for Nigel We only want what's best for him We're only making plans for Nigel Nigel just needs this helping hand And if young Nigel says...

The best of times, the worst of times, the times you can't ignore Sometimes you bite the bullet and you flip flop on the floor They tell you where to go, they t...

I once had an ice cube, Pretty little ice cube Now it's gone Now it's gone Her name was Mary, Pretty little ice cube Now she's gone Now she's gone She was so ...

In 1986, the University of Californa at Davis saw two of its all-time brightest stars, Dr Alphonse Mephisto and Dr Arnie Abesacraben Dr Mephisto worked hard tow...

She feeds her face with cheddar balls As my brain cells start to pop She licks her fingers stares away Her IQ slowly drops I pry my eyes as best I can From that...

They call me Mr. Knowitall I will not compromise. I will not be told what to do. I shall not step aside. They call me Mr. Knowitall I have no time to waste. My...

Hello Mr. Krinkle How are you today? Seems the rumors are about your team might move away Now, me I'm sentimental But I'm not one to cry Say there Mr. Krinkle ...

Mrs Blaileen - she was a sixth grade teacher And she controlled the children By using humiliation The target always seemed to be Donny He was a bit slower than ...

My friend Fats, he's a hell of a guy Let me tell you why He's the epitome of neighbourly My friend Fats, he's a hell of a guy Let me tell y'all why He drips pe...

My name is Mud Not to be confused with Bill or Jack or Pete or Dennis My name is mud and it's always been 'Cause I'm the most boring sons-a-bitch you've ever se...

There's a boy out 'luma way named Joe Eugene He's one mellow ass son of a bitch-a He loves his wheat grass and cold bean curd He's one healthy ass sone of a bi...

I pull the blinds then I take my clothes off Dance around the house like nature boy My genitalia and pectoral muscles aren't quite what I would like them to be ...

Used to come around here To peddle his wares A lot more takers now The turkey J You can taste the air Around your face His name was Barrest Jeffries They pick...

They headed southward from San Francisco, To be with Chuckles and the others With electric in the air and peroxide in their hair, They looked like golden brothe...

They broke out in laughter again, his lip beaded with sweat as they strapped him in, and he stood by and waited to be called The talk was of times that had gone...

Sgt Pilcher, Sgt Pilcher Ingeneous Sgt Pilcher He's found a way to make them pay, For the deviant things they do and say Pilcher, Sgt Pilcher Quick-witted Sgt P...

I ain't one for poetry, aint' one for prose Ain't one for the scent of a sping-time rose But the is one face that I do know, I sure get a kick out of that Beavi...

Now listen up you know ya come home from working that nine to five and lay yourself down on burgundy couch, you know, it never really was burgundy It was red, ...

Military show is Blastin' off to Kosovo Military show with lightning speed Sensitivity? Oh, just a rusty nail in the corporate show How many stabs before we ble...

Rain Rain Rain Rain Rain Rain Rain Rain Rain Rain There are stories of pleasure, there are stories of pain But the gods torment me with slabs of rain It starte...

By the light of the lamp I sit to type my notes on tab at my side I don't see the sun much these days, a fluorescent tan covers my hide How much impact shall I ...

C'mon kiddies gather round Who's your foremost friend in town? From main to maple the name resounds, Professor Nutbutter He's the one, the humble one, The Barkl...

Pass the pen there Billy Bob, I'll write us up a song Or perhaps I'll pen a sonnet, if the melody sits all wrong Hand me down a crayon, and I'll draw a mighty o...

Rancor, rancor Wake up and thank her Where's Billy Bob? Gene, weight the anchor Rancor, rancor You really oughtn't spank her Oh olalaberry Rancor, rancor Isabel...

Came up on a worried man, asked him if he had a light He reached on down, dug in his shoe, figured in his sock he might He asked if he could come and join, at w...

What are you wanting from me? Look over my shoulder as much as you please We're primed and we're ready to go toe to toe with disease And what are you hoping to...

We are gathered here Today in these majestic Halls of old to honor A man they call Sathington willoughby There?s a joke or two, A pun or three I feel that must ...

Snipping, snipping, snipping goes the scissor man Putting end to evil doers games Snipping, snipping, snipping goes the scissor man Maybe you are in his book of...

When the going gets tough And the stomachg acids flow The cold wind of conformity Is nipping at your nose When some trendy new atrocity Has brought you to your ...

There's a time for lies and a time for truth I say, eye for an eye, eye for a tooth When I roamed young, I'd scavenge around Every nook and cranny of our littl...

Your life is leaning downhill Sloping off the outer edge Your undetermined oyster beds Were found to be a hedge You cause the kids of Elmer Fudd To feed the far...

I'm going down to south park, gonna have myself a time Friendly faces everywhere, humble folks without temptation Going down to south park, gonna leave my woes ...

Quite a suprise What an ingenious device Boredom encompasses my time I don't know what I should do Indulging a moment of your time Seldom the breeder of lies B...

Why do we do this CG and I? Every night vegetables, Minds numbed up by THC I've got my pen, CG the remote Laurel and Hardy's the best bet at four AM On a Friday...

It's incredibly hot in here today, incredibly hot in here It's incredibly hot in here today, incredibly hot in here The air is getting slipper and it's not to m...

The Earth it did crack open on the day that I was born and a thousand merry pranksters came dancin' through the storm I lay cradle bound a howlin' out my mind ...

To the carpenter said the dainty bride Th e grass appears greener on the other side So let's clarify before we unite The grass is never greener on the other sid...

There was this kid in our neighborhood His Pop had named him Renegade He lived up to his name With all the trouble that he made One day ol' Renegade Snuck into...

The devil went down to Georgia He was lookin' for a soul to steal He was in a bind 'cause he was way behind And he was willing to make a deal When he came acro...

Suffocated by mirrors, stained by dreams Her honey belly pulls the seams Curves are still upon the hinge Pale zeros tinge the tiger skin Moist as grass, ripe a...

Through the door it slithers in, Accompanied by its peers Always groveling for attention, While no one really hears In its mind it's full of wit And quite the s...

I got blood in my gas tank, Bones in my steel I eat California condor For my Thanksgiving meal I'm the last superpower I'm the son of a loaded gun I'm Rapscalli...

The old diamondback sturgeon came swimmin' along Minding his business one day Rooting and sniffing and urging to spawn In the mud flats of San Pablo Bay A scen...

By the light of the lamp I sit to type-my notes on tab at my side I don't see the sun much these days A fluorescent tan covers my hide How much impact shall I h...

Fellow colleges, distinguished members of the press, ladies and gentlemen: I would like to take this opportunity to personally and humbly thank each and every ...

Messenger of fear in sight Dark deception kills the light Hybrid children watch the sea Pray for father, roaming free Fearless wretch Insanity He watches Lurk...