After wading through the flooded toilets To stand on the crumbling concrete steps Wind and rain beating in your face You mumble football's favorite phrase "That...

Barry John was the king of Rugby Union He was fast and agile and extremely good-looking All you'd see would be a flash of red Wales were best, 'cause he used hi...

When you ran 'round the block And you thought you were going to die You said you'd never run again And then you had another try And you felt a little better 'Ca...

Heysel stadium, it's easy to remember How the game continued despite the disaster "With all those millions of viewers, we've got to carry on It would be financi...

Business bought the athletes out With gold medals and role models Drugs and media and national pride Why join in when you can watch it on TV? So out of the stad...

All the runners running downhill All the throwers with strap-on muscles Gold, silver, and bronze To the designer-drugs and anabolic steroids Random testing does...

Oh, where are you now George? Now that wingers have been laid to rest And shirts have adverts across their breast And it's all about who's the richest Where are...

54 inch around the chest Stitching ripping on his vest Biceps, triceps, ready to flex A gold medallion around his neck He looks more like the Michelin Man He's ...

City, city, city City, Man city Living in the city Manchester city Colin Bell, Frannie Lee Neil Young, Mike Summerbee Rodney Marsh, Alan Oakes Tommy Booth and T...

She's a slip of a girl to be out of school She's a product of apartheid She won her spurs under minority rule She's a product of apartheid Afrikaners run the be...

It's all about getting the ball in the back of the net, Brian I'm as sick as a parrot, Brian I'm over the moon, Brian Well, I think the lads were well worth a p...

The little leagues, the spare-time sports Works teams and pub teams Sandwiches for the darts competition Oranges at half time Spare time tennis, scrambling on f...

How come all the best athletes Had the poshest kits While the slow, fat, thin, and spotty ones Had shorts that didn't fit? They never lingered in the changing r...

Knight to Bishop 4 Next move in the cold war In the Spassky/Fischer battle To see who rules the castle Spassky takes Hungary (and Czecks) Fischer takes Grenada ...

Cut and clipped to make you sleek Whipped and brushed from stall to track Laden down with heavy pack Or carrying rider on your back And finally your neck is bro...

That golden era That golden era David Bedford, Georgie Best Olga Korbutt, Eddie Mercx Tony Jacklin, Jochen Rindt Ille Nastase, Rachael Flint Gary Player, Clive ...

There's entertainment There's politics There's popular culture There's dialectics But never the twain shall meet Never the twain shall meet This is a myth, prop...

Remember Mexico '86? "Dirty" Diego, the Saint and Greaves All covering up the cracks of an economic crisis What the cameras don't show the viewers won't notice ...

There's pedal bikes and motor bikes And now they're riding mountain bikes Up and down and out of town Over, under, through, around I ride my little bicycle, I r...

Hey bugger me, now where's mi clogs? Sunday cap and Sunday togs Come along and pare some shins Winner often wins Hey ho! And away we go! Kick your opponent's sh...

Here's a good sport, it's easy to play And as good a way as any of throwing your money away Betting offices, men only Tobacco smoke and radio commentaries Betti...

At Farnley Park cricket ground there's a Sycamore tree And it stands thirty feet inside the boundary I think that someone slapped a Preservation Order on the tr...

I heard that in the First World War The soldiers called a truce For a Christmas game of football Instead of fighting their pointless war Instead of fighting the...

Bees buzzing, birds singing The jack turning off the crown A lawnmower in the distance The wood coming nicely 'round Sitting near the green just chatting A bad ...

In '36 the world's teams Played up, played up, and played the game Runners, jumpers, footballers All sieg-heilling the Fuhrer Not so the black Americans Who, po...

Away from work finding peace With a swing on the seventeenth lined with trees You're out playing golf for the day Hoping that with a bit of luck Someone will st...

Sat with strawberries and cream Listening to all the players scream From right to left and left to right "The ball was in!" "No, it was out!" The money goes up ...

A quiet Sunday afternoon, away from town and work Scatter all the groundbait down, relax with rod and hook But as the worm he wriggles round he dreams of just o...

The wife she washes the football strip The wife buys my sports socks and irons my kit I lose a golf shoe, the wife looks for it And that's what I call teamwork ...

In the light of the ignorance and misplaced fear Of the panicked bosses of the Football League It isn't surprising that hugging and kissing Are banned on accoun...

When Grandstand's finished, and Sport On Two And there's nothing much left to do Too lazy to leave the armchair Can only manage to plug in the computer And pret...

Whilst Robson plays his Sharp CD And Beardsley paints his lounge "hint of green" And the big clubs dream of a Superleague Of Keegan's "reasonable" three thousan...

Old, old limbs move slowly now Up and down stairs from bed to chair A balsa puppet struggles to remember Cheering crowds and famous victories That was a full li...

That Thompson and Cram both lost in Rome Was no surprise, when one thinks Of all the rubbish they consumed Those cereals and drinks Lured by big advertising dea...

Now he's going for the grey ball Into the top left pocket A touch off the slightly darker grey ball And he's snookered behind the grey ball Oh, he's going for t...

Mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the midday sun Taking on the locals, every man jack of 'em Stupid, drunken, gobby toughs No excuse is good enough Arrogant, ig...

The bowler's running in, the batsman lights a fag He keeps a packet handy and it's lodged inside his pad Because it's written in his contract that after every o...

From the deepest to the highest Battling for the yellow vest Changing gears rapidly Ten seconds to change a wheel King of the Mountains Queen of the flats Sprin...

Like two gigantic Buddhas Someone carved from jelly Huge yet nimble Strong yet gentle They pace the sawdust circle No flicker of emotion Huge yet nimble Strong ...

Frickley in South Yorkshire, a small mining town Where once the riot coppers beat the pickets to the ground Has a football team, and a stand full of fans Who lo...

For twenty years Graham Hill Risking life and lim Drove the circuits of the world And they said it would kill him "Going so fast is a fine way to win But one cr...

Outside the pu Smack you in the go Get four long years In Wormwood Scrubs Put me in a ring Fit me with gloves I get money and fame For doing what I love Smackin...

They call it hopscotch! Now this is where it all begins A piece of chalk and a boot-polish tin Hit the streets, no time to wait Draw them squares out, 1 to 8 Ho...

You like to make investments in your favorite sports Competition pays, talent can be bought So you made it your business To make it a business Now it's all abou...

"So, Greavsie, well, what about the black lads gettin' bananas thrown at em?" "Well, it seems a bit unfortunate, I mean, uh, uh" Sitting on the bench, he starts...

Na then! Get another drink! And get yourself sat down We'll have a game of shave ha'penny And loser gets next round Get another drink! And get your arrows out W...

The ancient sport of face-jumping Involved a skill unknown A jump onto a partner's face With ne'er a crack of bone Tom McSmee, a champion, In several tests of s...

Let's face it lads, you're really crap! But you're exciting to watch, I'll give you that Not for a wage, not for fame Not for directors For the love of the game...

Compass, whistle, cagoul, map Count your steps along the track To checkpoint one Checkpoint two Checkpoint three and back Compass bearing sou-sou-west Choose th...

Jos Naylor of Wasdale Greatest fell runner of our time Running the mountains And working the farm Cutting the bracken Constructing walls Studded farm boots Atta...

The evolution of humankind An opposing digit, the use of tools Inventing the wheel, exploring space Brain size still developing Two men and a referee Foam glove...

Every one of them, one in a million Blaze a trail and tear up the past Thank heaven for devils and sporting rebels Count the black sheep, and stuff the rest Sho...

I got a skateboard Oo-ee-oo! I'm skating down the street With my trucks all new Here comes the NME Coming into view Looking for a gimmick That it can screw "You...

England's goalkeeper since Gordon Banks Consistent, reliable, a safe pair of hands But despite all his saves and all his acrobatics I can't help recalling somet...

Three steps forward, two steps back Oblivious to all around Psyching up for the big jump Breathing getting deeper Then charging down the track Hitting the board...

Complete control of mind and matter Concentration, manipulation Movements swift, deadly, graceful Applying oneself with dedication Martial arts, an ancient skil...

Yuppies, I've been taught, Are keen on sport Two slices wholemeal loaf Into towelette jogging suit Once round the park Quick game of squash Staving off a heart ...

Both players and watchers, No-one knows the rules That's what makes the game so great "Just get out there And slug your opponent!" That's what makes the game so...

It's not so much the distance nor the time it takes It's not even the cold nor the pains or aches I can cope with blisters and the weight of my pack And I don't...

Michaelangelo was a genius Artist, architect, physician The darling of the Florentine scene Inventor, scientist, mathematician But less well-known are his regul...

British champion for fifty years Easily beats all his challengers Bored of always being the best He'd rather be like all the rest Miscuing shots and fluffing sm...

Polo has the biggest pitch of any ball game Polo has the biggest idiots On the biggest pitch of any ball game Polo has the biggest idiots With the biggest bank ...

I never liked rugby league, it must be said Decapitated ears and concave heads My interest held by just one thing The greatest commentator ever--Eddie Waring Wh...

If I had the wings of an angel The dirty black arse of a crow I'd fly over BBC studios And shit on the bastards below Shit on, shit on, shit on the bastards bel...

It's the old stock car thing Crash! Smash! Crash! Ring! Round the track and round again Crash! Smash! Crash! Ring! Revving, coughing, stutt-stutt-stuttering Ton...

With a flick of the boot and a nod of the head The ball goes crashing in the back of the net But the referee and linesman disallow the goal 'Cause the boot's on...

The millionaires are closing ranks Tax-dodging in the race to the bank Listen for the slamming of the stable doors After the horse has bolted Trapped fingers, a...

Hurling, the national sport of Ireland Was banned in 1366 As part of an Anglo-Norman attempt To crush all Gaelic resistance It failed Over six hundred years of ...

Dipping into his Filofax He wonders who he can buy next "C'mon, Play the game the Maxwell way And you'll never lose, come what may" There'll be the Maxwell Leag...

The new games tutor was like any other teacher Same blatant ideology they're trying to install in you At every opportunity they'd press us to compete Taught to ...

I always wanted to play In the school football team But the coach said I wasn't fast enough I wasn't no good it seemed I used to watch them practice But I never...

Step by step Climbing to the top Eddie the Eagle The epitome of sport Not for the winning Or the advertising deals Not for the money or glory Just for taking pa...

Another Sunday match again Another Merseyside clash again It's the 36th this season By my calculations That's when I made the decision To stay in the lower divi...

Too many crap programs With too many adverts Too much Matthew Engel bullshit And not enough dirt Media and programs All dull and mundane How to fill up space Wh...

Posed like swallows before a dive Five lanes, and on the left hand side Stands Tubby Barlow wet with fear Not quite sure what he's doing there On your marks, ge...

All gathered 'round the 18th tee With pringle and tartan and shooting sticks Binoculars, poised, ready to use Watching, waiting, there it goes! Great shot! Grea...

Chapt Two - Guess who? Manfred The Great The great king bashed down his goblet on the oaken table as kings do when they want more wine Everyone was silent 'Mins...

A Man walks into a bar He Says, "Give me a Bacardi and Coke" The back of beyond repair Welcomes the broken and the broke The latter hitches a ride On the back o...

People would have to be told that if they refuse to answer questions when they might be expected to answer questions, that is something which can be used at the...

M spells man, K spells kind, could somebody tell me is man kind? Manking is saying, gotta say goodbye now, gotto say goodbye to mother earth I mean, how could I...

Thirty years of the same old shit Of music, money, hit after hit Smiles, lies, sales, walls That's thirty years of rock and roll They changed it's name once or ...

Anybody can press a button and blow a ship up Anybody can use an atom bomb Anybody can pick up a big whip and whip you Anybody can stick a knife into you Anybod...

It was a teenage wedding, and the old folks wished them well You could see that Pierre did truly love the madamoiselle And now the young monsieur and madame hav...

A visionary pause in the cycle When she refused to buy or sell When the daughters of perfect wives Said there must be more sacrifice Needed more than symbolic c...

I wish, I wish, I wish, I wish (Repeats) But it's all in vain (Repeats) Different colors, different faces Different schools in different places Scour the mornin...

Sitting on the shelf when someone called my number With a template in one hand, scissors in the other 'What lump of clay is this?' Said the king maker to me Dul...

And so in the tradition of Manfred the Great The people built the glorious vision in his name Great Britain they called it, a land for heroes A land where no on...

Welcome to Never Mind The Ballots The phone lines are now open If you'd like to put a question to the candidates the number to ring is oh five three two seven s...

Always the winner, baby you're always the center, baby But don't ever get lonely at night When the crowds have gone away It's always your show girl, the lady, A...

Goodbye to the summer Sold down the river Unhappy ever after Well did you ever? Did you ever reach for the glued-down penny? Same old joke and it's not funny Bu...

Goodbye to the summer Sold down the river Unhappy ever after Well did you ever? Did you ever reach for the glued-down penny? Same old joke and it's not funny Bu...

Goodbye to the summer Sold down the river Unhappy ever after Why did you ever? Did you ever reach for the glued-down penny? Same old joke and it's not that funn...

Goodbye to the summer Sold down the river Unhappy ever after Well did you ever? Did you ever reach for the glued-down penny? Same old joke and it's not funny Bu...

I plot your rubric scara I steal your satin light I want your life to be mine Maybe tonight, maybe tonight I choose to steal what you choose to show And you kno...

Oooh, amnesia, oooh I don't remember I don't remember Do you (echoes) (Repeat) Do you suffer from long-term memory loss? I don't remember Do you suffer from lon...

Goodbye to the summer Sold down the river Unhappy ever after Well did you ever? Did you ever reach for the glued-down penny? Same old joke and it's not funny Bu...

Words to describe Nicaragua of old Cash crops and hunger and US control Coffee and sugar on company land Made to supply what the boss would demand Then one July...

Chapt nine, Armagodman The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want He maketh me to lie down in green pastures He leadeth me beside the still waters He restoreth m...

And the company director spins the globe Looks into on atlas of the world A supermarket lifestyle for as all A thousand nations under company control Coca-Cola ...

But how do kings and presidents, prime ministers and generals, and company chairmen sleep at night? How do they shut their eyes when they turn out the lights? T...