Thirty-six, thirty-two, blue cut, with a skull ring
Three stained bleach spots, and a whole in the knee
You say the man inside those Levi's don't take orders
She'll just have to realize you'll do as you damn well please

You wear the pants
Buddy good for you
I'm so impressed
Yeah, whoopty-doo
You need to know
That ain't how it works
It's not who wears the pants,
It's who wears the skirt

In the top drawer, of her dresser, there's some panties
Go try on that purple pair, with lacy frill
With your big old legs, I bet you can't get in 'em
With that attitude of yours, hell, I bet you never will

But you wear the pants
Buddy good for you
I'm so impressed
Yeah, whoopty-doo
You need to know
That ain't how it works
It's not who wears the pants,
It's who wears the skirt

A big old boy like you can probably bench 350
A little thing like her can barely lift the bar
Just wait 'til that woman has a headache
And she sits there with her legs crossed
Well, we'll see how strong you are

You wear the pants
Buddy, good for you
I'm so impressed
Yeah, whoopty-doo
You need to know
That ain't how it works
It's not who wears the pants,
It's who wears the skirt

You wear the pants,
She'll wear the skirt