Mad John came down from Birmingham very hastily
And from Borstal he had ran
He made it down to Torquay
Good boy Mad John

Mad John holed up
In an allotment she'd by a railroad siding
In came the man for the watering can
He didn't see John hiding
Good boy Mad John
Chorus:
Mad mad Mad John, etc

Mad John met Jill in a transport cafe
By the juke box loud
And over double eggs chips and beans
They made a solemn vow
And Jill paid the bill