Well there was Anna from Austin
and Betty from Boston
And Caroline from down in Tennessee
I was out to get
through the alphabet
Until I hit that terrible Z

Well L was a breeze
With Lottie and Louise
And M with Mavis and Marie
I had little trouble;
With most, I could double
Until I hit that terrible Z

Then I met Xona
From way out it Pamona
I said, "this is fate, I complete"
But I thought what chagrin
when she told me in the end
It started with an X and not Z

Now I'm looking for Zelda
Cause I've never held a
Girl whose name begins with a Z
And I'm gonna hate myself
If I die and don't date my self
A girl whose name begins with a Z