(Rhythm combo starts up out of vision and Sgt Duckie sings This is all part of the Policevision Pan-European song contest, of course Superimposed caption on screen: 'SGT DUCKIE'S SONG' Duckie performs a showy, happy dance and jauntily twirls his whistle chain)

Duckie:
I'm a little bit sad and lonely
Now my baby's gone away
I'm feeling kinda blue
Don't know just what to do
I feel a little sad today
Chorus of PCs:
He's a little bit sad and lonely
Now his baby's gone away
He's feeling kinda blue
He don't know just what to do
He's not feeling so good today
Duckie:
Wheeeen I smile
The sun comes flooding in (dadadadadada)
But wheeeen I'm sad
It goes behind the clouds again
Chorus:
He's a little bit sad and lonely
Now his baby's gone away
He's feeling kinda -
(they stop abruptly and say - etcetera, etcetera)