When you start your journey, you go meet your driver
You shake his hand and hope he's feeling well
The things to come may be somewhat unfamiliar
Like eating herring where the sun does not go down
Our driver calculates what time we'll hit down

And every time a border comes
We go inside and meet with someone
Perhaps a form will need to be filled in
Then we can go and restart up the engines

The plumbing often varies in the various different countries
I like to crouch down and turn on those bidets
I'll have a cocktail, pick at my fingernails
And then a squat down for a wash to end the day
Our driver recommends we try the soufflé

And every time a border comes
We go inside and meet with someone
Perhaps a form will need to be filled in
Then we can go on and restart up the engines

Then we went Down Under and we were told of farmer
Who brought some pigs in from the Old Country
But pigs eat turtle eggs and turtles eat jellyfish,
So now you get stung if you're swimming in the sea-
Our driver's gestures out beyond the palm trees

And every time a border comes
We go inside and meet with someone
Perhaps a form will need to be filled in
Then we can go an restart up the engines