There are nights when I think Sal Paradise was right
Boys and Girls in America have such a sad time together
Sucking off each other at the demonstrations
Making sure their makeup's straight
Crushing one another with colossal expectations
Dependent, undisciplined, and sleeping late

She was a really cool kisser and she wasn't all that strict of a Christian
She was a damn good dancer but she wasn't all that great of a girlfriend
She likes the warm feeling but she's tired of all the dehydration
Most nights are crystal clear
But tonight it's like it's stuck between stations
On the radio

The devil and John Berryman
Took a walk together
They ended up on Washington
Talking to the river
He said “I've surrounded myself with doctors
And deep thinkers
But big heads with soft bodies
Make for lousy lovers”
There was that night that we thought John Berryman could fly
But he didn't

So he died
She said “You're pretty good with words
But words won't save your life”
And they didn't
So he died

He was drunk and exhausted but he was critically acclaimed and respected
He loved the Golden Gophers but he hated all the drawn out winters
He likes the warm feeling but he's tired of all the dehydration
Most nights were kind of fuzzy
But that last night he had total retention

These Twin Cities kisses
Sound like clicks and hisses
We all tumbled down and
Drowned in the Mississippi River

We drink
We dry up
Then we crumble to dust