Well on the day that I left school
I thought that I'd be pretty cool
And I'd move up to the city for awhile
So I'm sitting in this cafe
With a coffee I mean latte
And the rotten waitress wouldn't even smile

Well all the girls round here
They're not into drinking beer
They're into sipping cocktails all the time
They don't get on the rum
They're not into having fun
Or they'd rather sit at home and poor a wine

City Slicking life ain't what it's cracked up to be
I'd better ring mum and tell her to put some stubbies on ice for me

'Cause I'm heading
Home to the country
Where the roads are dry and dusty
Where flanelet and blue jeans are the trend
Where there's lots of parking spaces
And nothing but friendly faces
And I'll never do the city thing again

All the blokes round here
They look at me and sneer
And they stare at the akubra on my head
With all that product in their hair
And their fancy underwear
You'd think that they'd be into blokes instead

City Slicking life ain't what it's cracked up to be
I'd better ring mum and tell her to put some blokes on hold for me

'Cause I'm heading
Home to the country
Where the roads are dry and dusty
Where flanelet and blue jeans are the trend
Where there's lots of parking spaces
And nothing but friendly faces
And I'll never do the city thing again

Guess I missed the city calling
And the food they serve's appalling
Well I'll hang out at my local pub instead
Where no one give you hassles
You can win a cold chook raffle
And at least the bar maids there can pull a head

City Slicking life ain't what it's cracked up to be
I'd better ring mum and tell her to put a lamb roast on for tea

'Cause I'm heading
Home to the country
Where the roads are dry and dusty
Where flanelet and blue jeans are the trend
Where there's lots of parking spaces
And nothing but friendly faces
And I'll never do the city thing again