Yeah
Alright
Way to go
Ooooooh
Ooooooooh
Way to Go, Yeah!
Alright

On a dark country highway,
In my candy-apple corvér
A strong smell of colidas
Made me change underwear
Up ahead in the distance,
I saw a sickening sight
My tank near empty
And the lights is dim
Reckon' I'd stop for the night
Ths sign out front said vacancy
So, I punched the bell
Dog mess everywhere I stepped
Holy cow, Oh my God what a smell
So she fired up a lantern,
And she showed me her face
False teeth and an old fruit jar
I thought I heard them say
Welcome to the Motel Californie!
Such an ugly place (such an ugly place)
Filled with toxic waste!
Aint that much room at the Motel Californie
Man this place is weird (man this place is weird)
Gosh I'm really scared!
The fossits were pricefestered
Scorched my contact lens
Hot set cold and the cold set hot
It burned the hair off my shin
My room resembled a scrapyard
From a busted up TV set
Rain was blowin throught my windows,
Now my bed's soakin wet!
So I called up room service,
For a cheeseburger and fries,
That thing tasted like It'd been cooked
Back in 1969!
You could my gas exploding from far away,
Woke up the clerk in the middle of the night,
I swore I heard her say
Have you enjoyed your stay at the Motel Californie?
Oh, I aint feelin well (I aint feelin well)
Cause the room sure smells
She said we give it our best at the motel Californie
Surley you got some rest (hope you got some rest)
Hell, I've froze to death
Staligtites from the ceiling
Thermostat covered in ice
And I pray, God I long for a holiday inn,
Or a Motel 6 would be nice!
Went to the old maid's chambers
For a clean change of sheets
Somebody stabbed her with an old buck knife,
She was cold dead and desceaced HAHAHA!
Last thing I remember,
I busted down my room door
Feeling nauceous as my stomach churned
From the scene I just seen before
Took some X-LAX from the night stand,
Here on the toilet I sat
As soon as I get my big butt from here,
I'm gonna call up Tom Beaudat!