The Untouchables


Monologue by Ike Willis

Rico! Youngblood! Wake up!
Prohibition is over, but the country's still a mess!
They need us out there!
We've got some cleaning up to do --
especially when it comes to
THIS GUY
Get those sport coats on with the big lapels
They're back -- they're fashionable again!
Okay -- let's look at some mug-sheets
of the suspects from the 80's

ADMIRAL POINDEXTER!
Get back on Felix The Cat where you belong!
Get the damn pipe out of your mouth!
You're history, you're gone!

OLIVER NORTH!
No more "Secret Government" for you, buddy!
You're over! you're trough!

BILL CASEY!
You're dead!

BUSH!
You're still a wimp --
I'm sorry -- you're history!

DEAVER! NOFZIGER!
You're crooks! Book 'em Dan-o!
Dan-o? How'd he get in the show?
Get outta here!

REAGAN!
You're asleep! Wake up!
The country's in a mess!
You're history anyway, buddy --
You're meat -- you're trough!
You're vapor -- you're baloney without the mayo!
You're outta here, buddy --
In fact, it's Robin Leach!
"I don't know why"

Hey, fellas -- take me to the bridge!
I want it now!
Rico! Youngblood!
Let's get outta here!
It's all over







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