Man, woman, birth, death, infinity

I'm Dr Shnorber, from Big City Hospital
Ben basey is my best resident doctor
He's only lost twelve patients this week

My boy, Dr Killjoy hasn't lost one in weeks
His summer replacement has been off
What a bedside manner that Basey has

(Ahhh, you're gonna feel stronger)
(A longer and feel so right)

As I understand it, the symptoms come and go
(Ooh ohh, sometimes I get a good feeling, yeah)

Sounds to me like we better operate on Barbara right away
(Wait a minute, wait a minute)

Okay, I'll wait 'til after lunch
What's for lunch Dr Killjoy
(Mashed potatoes)

Unlock the operating room nurse
(But she can't find her key)

Tell them to open up
(Let me in)

Alright, secure the patient to the operating table
(Something's got a hold on me)

I'm going to give you this needle to relax you
(Baby, baby, baby take it easy)

Are you relaxed now, Barbara?
(I feel so strange)

Check the list of instruments Dr Killjoy
(French toast, fire heidrant, ash can, pretzels and a monkey wrench)

Hey Doc, I got some medical students out there
Why don't I give you a buck a piece to watch the operation
Are you ready to perform the operation
Is there anything else you want
(I want a goodluck charm)

Hey Doc, the patient's coming out of it
She's trying to get off the operating table
(Come back silly girl)

Now remember Barbara
(Bobby don't cry, please don't cry, try not to be sad)
(I tried and I tried, but you hurt me bad)

Dr Shnorber, I think the operation was a success
(Congratulations)

Well, Ben Basey, how did you patient sleep last night
(Twistin' the night away)

You must be Barbara's boyfriend
What did you bring her
(And lollipops)

You have a visitor, Barbara, wake up
Eh eh, Barbara Barbara
Eh, Ba-Ba-Barbara, Barbara!

Well Doctor Basey, how is your patient
(Please don't ask about Barbara)