conceived, choreographed and directed by MICHAEL BENNET
book by JAMES KIRKWOOD and NICHOLAS DANTE
music by MARVIN HAMLISCH
lyrics by EDWARD KLEBAN

FOLLOWS "At the Ballet"

(AL finishes KRISTINE's phrases throughout)

KRISTINE (speaks) AL (sings)
See, I really couldn't sing I could never really sing What I couldn't do was Sing!
I have trouble with a note
It goes all around my throat
It's a terrifying thing
See, I really couldn't hear which note was lower or was higher
Which is why I disappear when someone says, "Let's start a choir"
Hey, when I begin to shriek
It's a cross between a squeak
And a quiver or a moan
It's a little like a croak
Or the record player broke
What it doesn't have is tone
Oh, I know you're thinking what a crazy ding-a-ling,
But what I really couldn't sing
I could never really sing
What I couldn't do was sing!

AL (guiding her, sings)
Three blind mice

KRISTINE (sings off pitch)
Three blind mice
(speaks)
It isn't intentional

AL (speaks)
She's doing her best
(sings again)
Jingle bells, Jingle bells

KRISTINE (sings off pitch)
Jingle bells, Jingle bells
(speaks)
It really blows my mind

AL (speaks)
She gets depressed

KRISTINE (speaks) AL (sings)
But what I lack in pitch I sure make up in power!
And all my friends say I am perfect for the

KRISTINE (sings off pitch)
shower

KRISTINE (speaks) AL (sings)
Still I'm terrific at a dance
Guys are comin' in their pants
I'm a birdie on the wing
But when I begin to chirp
They say, "Who's the little twerp
Goin' 'Pong' instead a 'Ping' "
And when Christmas comes and all my friends go

GROUP
Caroling,

KRISTINE (speaks) AL (sings)
It is so dishearten -ning
It is so disquiet -ting
It is so discourag -ging
Darling, please stop answer -ring!
See, I really couldn't sing
I could never really sing
What I couldn't do was

GROUP
Do re mi fa sol la ti do
DO ti la sol fa mi re do

GIRLS
La,

KRISTINE (off-key)
La,

GIRLS
La,

KRISTINE (off-key)
La,