I know a girl with skin as white as pearl
I kinda called her burly, why I did I do not know
And you can tell she didn't take it well
She hit me with a welly, in between the down-bellows

Well I'm just a fool with words
Fool enough to burst
I'm just a fool with words
And always pick the worst

Out on the down, feelin' out and down
I paddled in a fountain and got talking to a duck
And with a quack he told me what he lacked
He needed cash for crackers, but I didn't give a buck

Chorus

Down at the fair I pulled a gypsy's hair
He came from Tipperary and was looking debonair
I took a trip giving him the slip
Started off quite tipsy, ended looking worse for wear

Chorus