If brains were thousand dollar bills
I'd tell you what we'd bet
You wouldn't have enough
To buy a cup of coffee yet

Well, that ain't the way I heared it
But here's a though for you
Your's might as well be coffee grounds
For all the thinking they'll do

Well I guess I told you off
That ought to hold you for a spell
Furthermore if you don't like it
You can pack tonight, get out of sight
And go jump in the well!

Sometimes you make me so darn mad
That here's what I could do
I'd pick you up and shake you up
And bite you half in two

Well that ain't the way I heared it
And sister if you do
You'll learn right quick that you done
Bit off more than you can chew

Well I guess I told you off
That ought to hold you for a spell
Furthermore if you don't like it
You can pack tonight, get out of sight
And go jump in the well!

If common sense was ice cubes
You can take it straight from me
You wouldn't even have enough
To cool a glass of tea

Well that ain't the way I heared it
You're just a wasting breath
Huh, if them ice cubes was ignorance
You'd done be froze to death

Well I guess I told you off
That ought to hold you for a spell
Furthermore if you don't like it
You can pack tonight, get out of sight
And go jump in the well!