I brush my teeth and look in the mirror,
And laugh out loud,
As I'm beaming from ear to ear,
I'd rather pick flowers instead of fights,
And rather than flaunt my style,
I'd flash you a smile
Of clean pearly whites

I've been to the dentist a thousand times so I know the drill,
I smooth my hair,
Sit back in the chair
But somehow I still get the chills

"Have a seat" he says pleasantly,
As he shakes my hand and practically laughs at me,
"Open up nice and wide" he says peering in,
And with a smirk he says "don't have a fit,
This will just pinch a bit"
As he tries not to grin

When hygienists
Leave on long vacations
That's when dentists scream and
Lose their patience

Talking only brings the toothaches on because
I say the stupidest things
So if my resolve goes south I swallow my pride with an aspirin
and shut my mouth

Golf and alcohol don't mix
And that's why I don't drink and drive
Because good grief
I'd knock out my teeth
And have to kiss my smile goodbye

I've been to the dentist a thousand times
So I know the drill,
I smooth my hair,
Sit back in the chair
But some how I still get the chills