If you want to see me, I'll tell you what to do,
Knock three times on my trashcan lid, and then I'll know it's you
Knock three times (knock, knock, knock sound)
Knock three times (knock, knock, knock sound)
Knock three times (knock, knock, knock sound while he sings:)
And here's what I'll do:
I'll yell, "GO AWAY!"
'Cause I don't wanna see you

If you want to take me driving,
Out riding in your car,
Drive on up and honk three times, and I'll know who you are
Honk three times (honk, honk, honk sound)
Honk three times (honk, honk, honk sound)
Honk three times (honk, honk, honk sound while he sings:)
I'll just stay in my trash can,
'Cause I don't wanna ride with you

Now I don't care it you're big or small,
And I don't care if you're sho-hort or tall,
'Cause every spring and summer, winter and fall,
I don't wanna see anybody at all!

BUT! If you want to call me,
When I am all alone,
Dial my number and ring three times, and I'll know it's you on the phone
Ring three times (bring, bring, bring sound)
Ring three times (bring, bring, bring sound)
Ring three times (bring, bring, bring sound while he sings:)
And here's what I'll do:
I won't pick up the phone,
'Cause I don't wanna talk to you
(And I don't wanna ride with you
And I don't wanna SEE you)